Category: Motherhood

My letter to Mark this week

Dear Mark,

The day that you got hurt, you were probably in shock for many hours afterwards, dulling the reality of what you experienced. Perhaps there was some pain as the anesthetic wore off, and the reality of dealing with a cast is really a challenge. I know that it is no fun to have an illness or injury away from home. I remember being alone in the hospital in 2020 for many days. During that isolating and painful time, I came to hear God’s voice better than if I had spent those days happily at home. It was worth the pain to know the Lord better.

I hope that you feel our prayers for you and that the healing process is uncomplicated. I hope that you are able to manage any pain that you have. I hope that you will know God better through this experience. I think you were protected from worse injury. I think that you are going to be just fine. Before I knew that you were hurt, I experienced a really calm feeling that morning, and I knew it was a spiritual impression. I think the Lord was preparing me. As I looked back on the day, I realized that the Lord really did “speak peace to my mind” to let me know that you were being cared for … even before I knew what happened.

Here are some things I observed about you as we interacted that day that make me proud of you.

  • Your first concern was my experience saying goodbye to the McLaughlins.
  • You were upbeat.
  • You were anxious to tell us about the baptism and confirmation. What a gift you provided through your righteous exercise of priesthood authority.
  • You are loved by the missionaries who know you.
  • You were concerned about the cost of medical care for us, and didn’t dwell on the negative part of your day. You were selfless and brave. I am proud of you.

Sending hugs,

Mom 

Moving day

Daniel and McKenna are now Provo residents. We are thankful for all the pieces that came together so they could make this move. Daniel will no longer have that long commute to school at BYU.

We also had a video call with Elder Ross, so it was a bit of a reunion this afternoon.

Fun fact: I think that Tim is Daniel and McKenna’s landlord. 😄 Tim’s new adventure is that he is a property manager at my dad’s company.

Posting from the heart

Our kids didn’t have social media accounts until late in high school or after high school. This post showed up this week on Facebook from Mark, written in Danish. Missionaries in Denmark are having a lot of success on Facebook, which isn’t their generation’s social media platform of choice. So, despite being new to this part of the social media world, they post their hearts.

Hopscotch

I’m currently in a time warp because I have been tackling Christmas a little earlier this year. In my head, it is Christmastime, but the grocery store reminds me there is a big Thanksgiving holiday ahead. I have a friend who does her Christmas shopping by October, sets up her tree in early November, and sails through December. I admit that I don’t like to skip the focus of Thanksgiving, but this year, surrounded by Christmas preparations, I am not living in the moment. Maybe playing hopscotch over Thanksgiving helps me forget the empty chairs around our table as I make sure there are simple gifts beneath every tree. Perhaps focusing on Christmas is one way to show my thanks for my greatest blessings: our Savior and our family.

Oh, look. I wrote a book.

A mother of very young children asked me in church on Sunday, “So, what do you do all day [now all your kids are gone]?”

Lately, this is a difficult question to answer without some emotion, but I wanted to convey to her that I love my life. I have always been able to do the things that match my temperament, family, and interests. So I chose to say this about my new phase of life, “I am a writer, and solitude is good for that.”

A couple weeks ago, I compiled the talks that I’ve given in sacrament meetings and stake conferences for the last 9 years serving as a church organization president of a Relief Society and then stake Primary. Friends, I have written a book of religious thought without realizing it. 😂

Bedside photograph

This photograph sits at my bedside and it makes me feel the blessing of my years with our children. It’s a bright spot in the dull days of grief that I am experiencing. Yes, grief for a good thing like a son going on a mission! The feelings of loss will do their work and change me, and that is a gift. The sadness will also wane in its intensity. So, please be patient and gentle. I am under construction again.