When Mark was young, he liked to set up our little carnival pieces during the first days of summer vacation from school. Now I set them up for my own delight…and for our grandson.
Since the USA celebrates its 250th birthday this year, I included more bunting than usual. 🇺🇸
I can get overwhelmed by the problems I see around me. Sometimes I will have an interaction that leaves me speechless and baffled by the things I observed. Sometimes I’m part of the problem, but at least then I can do something about it.
There are other times when my actions and attitudes have no part in the problem. The person is beyond my reach or beyond my capacity to help. At these times, I’ve seen the emancipating power of this phrase during prayer, “I trust Thee,” meaning that I trust the timing and manner of God’s miracles. For me, a frequent equivalent of offering loaves and fishes is offering prayer.
It seems like it’s been a while since I’ve written anything on the blog. Picture posts tell a story, but not all. I’ve been doing my writing in a personal journal instead.
We’re meeting grief in all its faces. Some moments we feel more tender. Other moments we feel heightened frustration with inconveniences and people. There’s a need for familiar and comforting entertainment. We’ve laughed together, and moments later notice that sharing the obituary of Richard’s dad with well-intentioned friends keeps the wound fresh. I’ve cried in public and plundered our stash of candy like a kid.
Today Richard and one of his brothers are on a ride around their dad’s favorite haunt, Fish Creek. I imagine this will help them enjoy memories of their dad and carry on his good legacy. Finding solace in memory and tradition is a great idea.
I’ve tried many times to purge the children’s art from our storage room. It’s been 20 years and I still can’t throw away this rendering of a cookie factory by a very young Daniel. (And many other masterpieces by our kids.)
Other things that I find difficult to remove, but should:
high school awards and yearbooks
unused recipe books
extra mugs
books I will not read again
plates we never use
old sleeping bags
unused picture frames
power cords collected over 30 years
cast off cell phones
old pillowcases
baby blankets
extra throw pillows
We don’t keep our clutter in the open. It lurks in our storage areas and closets. Decluttering is perpetual for me, but it really ramped up when the children left home. People don’t notice a difference when I clear a closet shelf or storage bin, but I notice that my mind is a little more free.
Today we celebrated Queenie, who graduated from the University of Utah in Human Development and Family Studies with honors. Woot!
Daniel and McKenna were my buddies to ride up to campus on the train. They made the journey a delight.
I saved some extra seats in the arena just in case we needed them. I abandoned the extra places when we realized we had too many, only to see a few minutes later that my nephew Ray and his girlfriend had claimed them. They were there to cheer for a different graduate, so we were all surprised to see one another. 🥰
We are so impressed by Queenie’s many accomplishments.
As I waited in my seat for Daniel’s graduation exercises to begin, I realized that I graduated from BYU 30 years ago. 30!
It surprises people that I have a degree in biology teaching because I don’t fit the mold, and I never used my teaching certificate. I don’t spout off the scientific names of trees and animals unless it’s appropriate, like when we stop in Yellowstone to watch the Bison bison. The emphasis for my degree was in Zoology, and I can boast that I have dissected just about everything. I have even worked with cadavers. I studied in labs and large lecture halls, and I did a lot of field work in my degree, too. I don’t talk about my good memories of catching insects and identifying trees, but I was good at the study of biology and I loved it. I also loved teaching high school. I could feel when my students understood a concept, and I enjoyed the challenges of a classroom of teenagers. I really liked my students. I loved making interactive lessons where we would get away from our desks to learn, and I enjoyed the hunt for visual aids and the adventures of collecting wood, insects, and leaves. It was a challenge to find creative ways to teach photosynthesis and the Krebs cycle, and through such challenges, I discovered that I had a gift for teaching and wonder.
I finished my BYU course work during the first semester of our married life, and did my student teaching at Mountainview High School in Orem the next semester. We learned we were expecting Paige just before Christmas, right before I was to begin my student teaching, and we were so happy. I experienced morning sickness during the first weeks of observation in the classroom, so I smuggled in saltines which I broke into tiny pieces to sneak into my mouth. I didn’t tell my cooperating teacher I was expecting a baby, and he was surprised when I shared happy news from my ultrasound in April, just before I completed my semester with him. I didn’t want my pregnancy to influence his opinions of my teaching.
I graduated in April 1996, and I remember President Gordon B. Hinckley smiling at the parade of graduates as we came across the bridge and walked right in front of him to enter the Marriott Center. I remember the faces of my parents when I looked up at them at the Smith Fieldhouse after I received my diploma, especially my dad who was beaming. I remember my little sisters coming down to see me when it was over, and how they looked at me. I wish I could have been at their graduations to repay the support they showed me. I remember Richard taking me to the Provo temple grounds (the place I always want to go on the way home) and making sure to take several pictures to mark the day.
I graduated Magna Cum Laude from the College of Biology and Agriculture with a degree in Composite Biology Teaching with a Zoology emphasis. I also came away with a strong background in scripture because of the religion courses I took. What a treasure.
BYU prepared me to serve my family, my community, and my church. The older me wishes to tell the younger me that my education was both a gift and a real achievement. I have been able to use every class and BYU experience as a mother, member of the Church, seminary teacher, home educator, and friend.
Be sure that you don’t believe that you are the “true teacher.” That is a serious mistake… Be careful you do not get in the way. The major role of a teacher is to prepare the way that people will have a spiritual experience with the Lord.
Gene R. Cook, Teaching No Greater Call, p. 41, 1999.
I think this quote relates to many interactions in life, not just gospel teaching. Parenting, interactions with others, online presence…
When I’m in a teaching moment, my preparation matters, but only if I use it to point to Jesus Christ.
April is the biggest month for birthdays in our extended family. It’s a good thing I am an empty nester with a flexible schedule so I have time to give attention to them. 😂 The post office has been a frequent haunt this month, as well as my car.
April is also the beginning of school year-end events. This week I got to cheer for Solomon. Tomorrow I get to be a proud mom as Daniel graduates from BYU. 🎓
The formula for accomplishing anything is to be consistent. I follow this formula in many areas of my life, but I can’t seem to be consistent with creativity or ideas. These are whimsical things. While I wait for the little muse to visit, I work on fundamentals like writing good sentences, even if the subject matter is a Sunday school lesson or a little blog post. Creativity may be stop and go, but I try to nurture my skills and devote consistent time to support it.
I like this quote,
Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working.
-Pablo Picasso
Dear Reader,
This week I achieved 17 years of blogging. I’ve written here longer than I lived in my childhood home…or any home. I have blogged longer than I homeschooled our kids and longer than my years of formal education. This blog has been a kind of home for my thoughts, as well as an education as I have wrestled to compose over 2,600 posts.
Here are some things you may not know:
I want to quit writing this blog quite often. 😔
I almost always feel uncomfortable and insecure as I hit, “Publish”. 😳
When someone tells me something positive about the writing, I feel so wonderful. ♥️
Unlike the early years, this blog will only occasionally have family updates. Our children have their own lives now. 👩👨👨👨
I stopped monitoring to see if people were reading and this freed my mind to write what I want. 🗽
Almost every post goes through multiple revisions, yet I am sure you have noticed I retain plenty of errors. 😬
This blog doesn’t help me feel connected to others, but I think it makes people feel connected to me. It’s solitary work.🏝️
Whenever I want to quit, words such as, “Change your attitude,” “Don’t worry about popularity,” and “Keep going,” come to my mind. So, I keep writing for my family. 🪄
Thank you for being a friend of my blog. Once something is published and public, it takes a new life in the minds of readers. This is where difficulty and disappointment can enter, but also the potential for good. The writing is mine and has its own personal meaning, but when you read, it also becomes yours to take what you need and build your own thoughts. Truly, I hope that it helps you. I write because I love.
🩷A