Category: Motherhood

how it’s going

I think that my current anxieties about getting the right clothing for Mark’s mission are because I know that these are some of the last tangible things that I can do for him. We are moving into a different phase where my help shifts almost completely to intangibles. I am crying every day, as one does at such a time.

He has clothing for Arctic temperatures and rain and a lifetime of other preparation. We now have just a few minor things to purchase.

All I need to do is look outside to see my annual “missionary sunflowers” (which first showed up when Daniel left on his mission) for a reminder that God is taking care of everything for Mark. And He allows me to do the very motherly thing to shop for the right coat.

Autumn display 2024

I read someplace that people who change their decor each season have a cleaner house because the process exposes dusty corners and reminds you of things you are storing. Thus, you are dusting and reevaluating your belongings often.

Hmmm. I usually associate redecorating with a big mess. It takes me all day to switch out decor in the kitchen with boxes and tissue papers strewn everywhere.

I redecorate for the seasons because I like the change. I am a little spare in my autumn decor this year because I need something simple to view.

Mark was sad to see the summer decor taken down. I reminded him that in a few years when he returns, I will still have the summer things that he has loved while growing up.

“You’re going to go, but you are also going to come back, and this will all be here waiting for you.”

I could say this about the objects, but not about his childhood. I think we both knew he wasn’t really mourning the loss of the little baseball players and ferris wheel. He knew that this was the last summer display of childhood, and he won’t be the same little boy who loved these things ever again.

If you want to go to Denmark, you’re going to need to do some things.

Our experiences have been vastly different preparing for our sons’ mission assignments.

For Mark, there was an 18-page visa form, and recently, he had to appear at a visa processing center for the Danish embassy in San Francisco.

We assumed that he would be paired with another elder and be picked up at the airport by someone from the local mission in San Francisco. We were surprised when the church travel office instructed Mark to fly there alone and find his own way to the visa interview appointment and back again to the airport.

Traveling alone and ordering rides were new to Mark, but he did just fine.

The thought occurs to me, how long has my presence with Mark been obsolete? Years?

Still, I prayed all day. When each child flies out of reach or has a problem beyond my ability to help, my prayers become a testament that Heavenly Father has always been the primary caregiver.

Here was Mark’s text to let me know that he was boarding his return flight in San Francisco. 😂

I bought him a huge hamburger for dinner after I picked him up from the airport.

Rest

With Mark gone about 3 days a week, I find that my days are empty, just a preview of how it will be when he leaves.

I am not looking for advice or sympathy. In fact, if someone offers it, I bristle.

While expected, this phase has surprised me with its hollowness. My time with my children at home is ending and I don’t feel drawn to do anything. All those things I said I would do later have simply stopped calling.

I feel weary, but more aware and more wise.

My days feel hollow, but personally, I am intact.

I just want to be completely still all of the time. I could take time to really develop this thought, but that would interrupt the stillness that I crave. Here is a simple explanation.

In music and in life, there are necessary rests, pauses, and changes in theme.

The best way I can express it is that I have come to a point of arrival in my song that requires a pause. A rest.

Soon, I will pick up a new theme or begin a new movement. But now, during this scorching summer, I seek rest.

Montana and Glacier National Park

We stayed in Whitefish, Montana in an Airbnb called 3 Bears Cottage. It was adorable.
In the evenings we sat outside and read, then watched movies before bed. One night we watched an action movie. The next night we watched Mall Cop. Mall Cop was better than the action movie.
It was a serene place to stay.
We had one day to see Glacier National Park. We took the day to drive the Going To the Sun Road, 51 miles of narrow winding road each way. The views were beautiful. There were red touring cars all along the route. To drive this road west to east, you need a reservation. Richard secured our reservation many months in advance.
The water was so blue.
Mark is always in search of rocks in the water.
We are getting splashed by the waterfall in this shot.
Waterfalls were everywhere, some right next to the road.
We couldn’t find parking at the top for the high line trail, so Richard and I drove down the road while Tim and Mark hiked.
I believe this is the most beautiful picnic site I have ever seen.
This water was full of colorful rocks. Someone called them “fruity pebbles.”
We saw two bears on this day, one near our cabin, and one in Glacier. Both bears crossed the road right in front of our truck.
We broke up the drive home by staying one night in Island Park, Idaho, where we borrowed a friend’s side by side and drove to this beautiful place with crystal clear water.

It took all day to drive through Montana each way. Highlights were the big lakes, but a lot of the time Montana reminded me of Nevada. We were able to finish our audiobook in northern Utah, and when we got home, I felt some withdrawal symptoms from not hearing our British narrator all of the time.

Well done, Richard, on the planning and work you did for this trip!

Yellowstone 2024

We drove into Yellowstone on Tuesday and visited much of the park that day. Yellowstone is familiar, but still my favorite. We stayed in a lodge at Old Faithful, which meant that we could explore until bedtime.

People lined up to take photos at this spot at Artist’s Point. A crowd of people surrounded the person taking our photo and told us encouraging things, “This will be your Christmas card!” And, “Will you send one to me?” “That is a great shot!” People can be so nice.
Taco salad picnic
A little view of Old Faithful for those who haven’t seen it in a while.

Jackson, WY and Grand Teton National Park

I’ve decided to post photos from our trip in portions over the next few days because this seems to be the best way to honor the great planning that Richard did for this trip. Our days were full and we slept soundly every night.

The first leg of our trip was through Jackson, Wyoming and Grand Teton National Park. We began our audiobook of the trip, The Fellowship of the Ring, read by Rob Inglis. It was a great backdrop for our adventures in the hills and mountains. We tried different narrators, but he was our favorite.

We left on Sunday after church and enjoyed a picnic dinner in a mountain campground before continuing our drive to Jackson. We loved driving through the beautiful Star Valley as the sun set over the very green fields in this open valley. The Star Valley Temple was right on the main road through town.

On Monday morning, we drove into Grand Teton National Park. We couldn’t stop for everything, but we tried to locate the most interesting places.

One of our early stops was a group of pioneer houses called “Mormon Row.”

This view of the Snake River and The Grand Tetons was made famous by Ansel Adams, and it seemed to be Mark’s favorite view at the park.

In the line of the Teton Mountains, Mount Moran seemed the least of them until we drove a little closer and discovered how beautiful its reflection was on the water.

During the afternoon, the men went on a white water rafting trip. I rested in the hotel room because I am exciting like that.

In the evening, we went on a wagon ride to a chuckwagon dinner just outside of Jackson. The wagons were pulled by draft horses and we chatted with people in our wagon from Huntsville, Alabama and San Francisco, California. There was a live band with a fiddler and guitars for entertainment at dinner. I think the favorite parts of dinner were the beans and the cookies.

The boys shopped for shirts, hats, and candy in town.

This was a great first day of vacation.