Purpose of prayer

In Ether 1 of the Book of Mormon it says that the prophet prayed for his family and friends who were refugees looking for a home. The Lord had compassion and told him to prepare to go to a choice land “…because this long time ye have cried unto me.” (Ether 1:43)

So, does this mean that all we need to do to get what we want is to pray long enough and hard enough?

I don’t think this is how things work. Jesus taught in the parable of the unjust judge that a corrupt official will show mercy just to be rid of someone who asks and asks for something, but God is surely better than that. (Luke 18:1-8)

I don’t think that the brother of Jared wearied the Lord or wore him down with requests so he finally said, fine, have what you want. I think this story illustrates how prayer makes us ready to receive the huge blessings that the Lord already has waiting for us.

In other words, prayer doesn’t chip away at the Lord’s iron will to withhold blessings. Rather, prayer chips away at our own wills and our pride, and helps prepare us to level up in understanding and joy.

After all, we pray to a God who knows our needs before they are spoken. (Matthew 6:33) So, prayer isn’t about informing Him of needs, but connecting with Him.

Please don’t let your prayers sound like a shopping list. The Lord’s perspective transcends your mortal wisdom.

President Russell M Nelson

Prayer is the vehicle for us to understand that God is there. He gets us. He will bless us in ways that will ultimately help us return to Him, and often that means He doesn’t remove every pain right away.

Pray in the name of Jesus Christ about your concerns, your fears, your weaknesses- yes, the very longings of your heart. And then listen!

President Russell M Nelson

Pray to have eyes to see God’s hand in your life and in the world around you. Ask him to tell you if He is really there-if He knows you. Ask him how He feels about you. And then listen.

President Russell M Nelson

I pray for an evolving list of people by name, but I have changed how I pray for them. I used to kind of whine and beg. Okay, I still do that sometimes. But, more and more, prayer has become the moment in the day where I can tell God that I trust Him with these precious people and that I trust His wisdom and His power to help. Sometimes during prayer I will quote a scripture of praise. This has been a helpful shift in how I approach my Father in Heaven in prayer.

By the way

One morning last week, my second counselor and I made a visit to a ward Primary leader. We were with her for about a half an hour and I shared a scripture and we prayed together before we said goodbye. As we walked to the car, I was feeling good until we saw the dog.

This large, unleashed dog saw us at the same moment that we saw him and he charged toward us to greet us. I have childhood trauma from mean dogs, and I never want to see a large dog running toward me, friendly or not. So, I was definitely not at my best when I saw this happy? savage? dog running straight for us. “I don’t like anything about this,” I said, and Barbara tried to divert the dog’s attention from me. (Bless her.)

But the owner of the dog was also there, unseen on his skateboard in the street. He ran over to fetch his friendly dog. Still, I hadn’t started breathing yet, and the fight-or-flight chemicals in my veins definitely continued to react.

But then I really looked at the young man. I recognized him! He had been on Tim’s ultimate Frisbee team before the pandemic. And in that moment I knew that I needed to be a friend to him.

I began where I was, flustered, not quite myself, and said, “I know you!”

And suddenly, I remembered his name, which was one that I hadn’t uttered in probably 5 years, and then we were having a surprisingly vulnerable conversation about church. Church!

When he said he wasn’t part of our church, the words, “That’s just fine, we love you all,” came out of my mouth. The young man swept back his hair and we talked for a few more minutes.

“Did I just tell this young man that we loved him?” was the shaming thought that came to my mind as we left the scene. But as more hours and days have passed, I have realized that the words I spoke were really not my own. I also remembered that some of my favorite stories of Jesus happened during unexpected meetings. The woman with an issue of blood was not his original focus or destination, and neither was the Samaritan woman, but these “scenes by the wayside” show his disciples the perfect pattern:

Take time to talk to someone. Be real. Offer hope. Share love. The people you meet by the wayside might just be the ones you are meant to talk to that day.

Things that helped

After reading through my 2023 blog posts, I’ve decided that I want to end the year by listing one daily, one weekly, and one monthly thing that helped me get through a year which was actually very challenging.

A daily practice that helped:

  • I took the counsel of President Nelson and I kept a journal of impressions that I had while I prayed, and I acted upon those impressions. This created a leap in progress in my understanding of how revelation works and how interested God is in my life.

A weekly practice that helped:

  • Friday dates with Richard

A monthly practice that helped:

  • I tried to do a variety of work in the temple. Richard and I were able to complete temple ordinances for several ancestors with the help of our children, my brother, and my parents.

I have also looked over my reading list from 2023 to see where I have been. I have a special shout-out for Charles Dickins’ David Copperfield and Annie Dillard’s Pilgrim at Tinker Creek.

As I prepare for 2024, I don’t have any major resolutions. I do have plans to keep my good habits, while giving myself the grace to just do one thing at a time, including new things.

Wishing you a gentle look back at your 2023, and a hopeful look forward to your New Year.

Love,

A.

2023 Advent Calendars

Today I began delivering my 2023 scripture advent calendars to my friends. The theme of the calendar this year is prayer.

As I made my deliveries, the walk in the cold air and bright sunlight was lifegiving. This year, I am giving a small rock with each advent, so I was carrying a big bag of rocks, but it got lighter over time. 😂

These scriptures are meaningful to me and show what I have been thinking about this year. I’m not trying to correct anyone, but I want to share light.

Prayer Fog

Such a helpful insight from Becky Craven on Instagram today!

In my journals from the busiest years of my life, I often expressed frustration because I struggled to concentrate during my personal prayers. In one journal, I used the pages to write out my prayers, thinking that this would improve my focus.

I wish that I had understood that some of those thoughts that snuck into my mind during my seemingly unfocused prayers were God’s way of reaching me.

Also, I understand now that during those elemental prayers, which were scattered and pleading, I was actually creating a relationship with God because I was being real. He didn’t want a formal structure as much as He just wanted to hear from me. My prayers were effective, and I didn’t know it.

So, today I encourage you to keep praying through the frustration and fog. We may not see it now, but heaven is closer and more helpful than we can imagine.

Dream Home

July 2 Sunday dinner

Each year on July 2, I remember this was the day that I walked into our house for the first time, and I knew that this was where we should live. It was a unique experience for me, where I suddenly understood the meaning of an old dream. This was my kitchen in the Salt Lake Valley that my dream prepared me to recognize.

I have filled books with our experiences, photos of youth activities and neighborhood parties, and handwritten cards from this era of our lives. It is the neighborhood connections with specific people, including our children’s spouses, Michael and McKenna, that make me I believe that the Lord brought us here.

Sharing faith online

I am trying to be more mindful of what I write online. My blog posts are going through a more rigorous editing process, with most posts simmering for days before I hit, “Publish.”

My religious posts have the most revisions because I want to share uplifting things well.

I understand that not everyone wants to read about church or God. I post religious content on my blog because I know that readers are here by choice. But occasionally, I post something religious on social media.

In May, I shared on social media a talk given by a general authority because it had been helpful to me. A friend left a comment explaining that the talk was hurtful. Both of us took time to communicate about the post in a respectful way. I love my friend, and I told him that his opinions won’t change that.

I was pretty sad that my friend found pain in something that has inspired me. I questioned whether I should have shared the talk, even though it was from a worthy source. I questioned my motives, weighing the pride behind my post against my good intentions. As I thought and prayed about this, I realized many things, and I want to share a few of those things here.

First, personal choices, experiences, and culture influence how people see the same things so differently, but religion is not inherently hurtful. The things that cause discomfort often indicate something we need to face about ourselves. I learned through this uncomfortable experience that pointing someone to the Source of truth is better than establishing truth or proving a point.

Second, there are poor, good, better, and best ways of sharing faith. I acted hastily, as I do sometimes, when I am trying to gain the courage to share. If I had paused, I might have been instructed by the Spirit to share the content differently. Still, God can work with my imperfect efforts. My post led someone to listen to something new. Who knows how this experience will affect my friend’s life moving forward. I hope something positive will come from this, even if it’s just knowing that I still care.

Third, the goal can’t be to please everyone. The goal is to be a light. I want to be a gentle, steady light, not a spotlight focused on myself, and never an interrogation lamp to accuse.

In 1834, the Lord gave some instructions about the Latter-day Saints’ behavior and words in the midst of opposition. While I don’t face the same level of opposition, I think that this is a good personal guide for expressing faith:

Be very faithful and prayerful, and humble before me…reveal [share] not the things that I have revealed…until it is wisdom in me.

Talk not of judgments, neither boast of great faith nor of mighty works…

And behold, I will give unto you favor and grace in their eyes, that you may rest in peace and safety.

Doctrine and Covenants 105:23-25

So, I gather my scattered courage, friends, as I keep trying to shine a light. Sending courageous wishes to you as you do the same. The Lord is working with us.

And they went forth, and preached every where, the Lord working with them, and confirming the word with signs following.

Mark 16:20

This disaster is actually a tender mercy.

Richard awoke at 3:30 am on Saturday and had an impression that he should check the furnace room. He found the beginnings of a flood in this basement area, and bleary-eyed, we cleared out the wet boxes and vacuumed up excess water on the floor through the early hours of the morning. We were able to discover the leak was from the water heater. There was minimal damage, and the carpets are fine.

We were disappointed, as we had plans to go to Susanna’s wedding reception on Saturday, which we had to miss. We were also without hot water for a couple of days.

The thing that we will remember is that we were so completely cared for by the Lord.

He inspired Richard to wake up so he could protect our home. The flood began before we were scheduled to be away from the house. Mark was home on Saturday and could help Richard move out the old water heater and bring inside the new one. Richard had tools, knowledge, skill, and some helpful insights from others so he could install the water heater himself, long before any plumber could come.

I don’t know why we were spared the trial of a fully flooded basement, but I know who spared us.