One of the nicest things someone has done for me lately is to ask to read a short book of family history that I wrote. She not only read it, but took the time to compliment me when she returned it. She asked questions about people and noticed that I had written it when I was raising small children. She said she liked my ancestors. It really made a difference to hear every word from this valued friend.
The time my friend invested to read and tell me good job was like someone shining a light on a dark stage, recently darkened by the passing of my grandmother and our kids growing up. Thank you, J for shining a light.
I have made some progress on the doll I started in February.This is the back of the head. I line up pins in a row where I want the part to be and wrap yarn around each pin, then and around a stick. The stitches you see on the right are the anchor stitches for all the facial embroidery. When I do the other half of the hair on the back of the head, they won’t show at all. Also, ignore the needle in this picture. I’m just using the head as a pin cushion.I use upholstery thread to sew each loop of hair down, followed by a tack stitch to keep it in place. (By tack stitch, I mean a small stitch right beside the stitch that I have already made through the loop of yarn. This keeps the thread from coming undone.)Here is a closeup of the stitch I make through the loop of yarn, just without the pin in the way. I am actually repeating what I have already done for the picture. I don’t normally do two stitches through the loop of yarn.
A friend passed away before I could finish this doll for her. So, I really don’t who needs it, nor do I have a great plan for the hair. It will probably be two ponytails or braids. I placed the hairline back from her face to allow for bangs, but I could always add more long hair in front of I decide against them. My observations about yarn are that woolen yarns seem prettier to me, and the thicker the yarn, the less work to fill the head with hair. I have used all kinds of yarn, thin and thick, acrylic, pure wool, and woolen blends, and I actually have a very pale blue yarn waiting for my next doll.
The thing that takes the most time, at least for me, is the decision making. We’ll see what develops. Somehow, even though this doll represents a missed opportunity and the loss of a friend, she smiles at me, and I know it’s okay that I didn’t finish in time.
To see earlier progress on the doll, here are links to the posts.
Tim spoke in church and it was the longest I have heard his voice in years. He keeps it all to himself, the humor, the insights, the excellence. Some people just don’t show a need for approval, and he is the most independent person I have ever known. In only one class has he asked for help. Even when we were homeschooling, he would take his work to his room and do it alone. I came home from church and took a personal video of the recording of church services so I can hear his voice and his testimony whenever I need it, and I hugged him up and told him how proud I am of him.
Richard went on a trip to Moab with friends over the weekend, and our dog, traumatized by the separation, found a place in his suitcase as he unpacked on Saturday night.
We all self-soothe in some way about anticipated separations. I make a recording and the dog tries to stow away. I have found 3 gray hairs during my life so far. All have happened around the time of high school graduations.
This morning I awoke at 4:30 am and my mind was *on*. My notebook lay on the bedside table and I made the decision to turn on the lamp. Knowing how ideas, like butterflies, go, I wrote down what my mind had to say.
Later, in the human hours of the morning, I tried to deliver some flowers to someone, but her children wouldn’t leave the door to fetch her. Two red haired boys stood mesmerized as they looked at the flowers in my hands, and didn’t seem to understand I was asking to see their mom. Their eyes told me they should be the delivery people, so I handed them to the youngest and most eager, who immediately assumed new decorum as he marched forth. I stopped by to visit my mom for her birthday and found her giggling with her best friend of 30+ years. Lots of hugs today.
Mark and I were left alone tonight, so we ate out at Pizzeria Limone and sipped soda like pals.
I didn’t ask for anything from my grandmother’s home except the gray fox stole from the 1940’s, that is, if no one else wanted it. This and a few other treasures are now home with me. I don’t know if I dare wear the fur in public, but it is keeping me warm this cold evening. It snowed like it was Christmas today.
A year ago today, I was hospitalized and had just lost 53 cm of my small intestine. One minute I was well, and the next, I was not. A year later, I feel blessed to have this uneventful but active day.
Spring Break happened, but we didn’t travel. I put miles on the car going back and forth to shuttle Mark to be with cousins. I finally visited an antique mall in Springville and purchased some beautiful plates there. I sewed with friends one afternoon, and I think that I drove our cross-country-road-trip-conversation about funerals.
I spoke in a leadership meeting at stake conference, which is a rare opportunity, so I dedicated each morning of Spring Break to writing and practicing my delivery. When the meeting was over, I rested on the couch and didn’t move for a long time. Richard watched a miniseries, The Woman in White with me. He worked in the yard all weekend.
Daniel enlisted Paige to illustrate something for a biology project. Tim worked so much on his landscaping job that we rarely saw him. Two more of us received a vaccine for COVID-19.
Our dog has ailments, then rallies.
Today everyone is back to routines: school, work, music, etc. but I am lagging. On Mondays you usually find me at my best, but I need a rest from the “break” we had last week from routine.
We borrowed our family history center’s photo scanner and I enlisted help from our oldest kids and Richard to scan hundreds of photos one evening this week. It is the most amazing thing to suddenly have digital copies of photos taken before we had a digital camera. It makes me happy and it was so easy.
Here we are on Easter. There is Richard who spent the day preparing food in his smoker, wearing one of his many blood donation shirts. I rushed into the day without thinking about doing my hair (typical), but tried to set the table beautifully and have a clean kitchen. Mark wears his favorite color and will go on to eat more than anyone sitting at this table. Tim teases us with the BYU shirt and remains mysterious about his plans for the future. I’ll add that he is so strong from his landscaping work. I notice that Daniel is wearing a new version of the teal and white shirt he loved and wore all through high school and his mission. He’s almost finished with his first year at BYU, and his friend, the lovely McKenna joins us at the table. Paige is effortlessly elegant and happy, and has spent the last year since graduating from BYU settling into working as a freelance illustrator. And there is handsome, hardworking, and smart Michael, who changed jobs this year and is enjoying more sleep (even in April… he’s an accountant).
The blog is less about our children than it used to be, but they remain the ones who occupy our thoughts and conversations. They are still the focus of our energy and time, and when they linger at Sunday dinner as they did this week, I can draw from that happiness for a long time.
Some of you have read this blog from the beginning. There are 1,919 posts in the archives. I owe you a diploma or something, not that I have anything figured out except perhaps how to muster a tiny bit of faith. To each reader, whether you have read for years or months, I send my love to you.
Easter weekend is here. The Sanchez family has been busy getting ready for the memorial for my grandmother. Mixed in with music practice, writing her life sketch, and other things, I have been editing pages of my dad’s memoir of his growing up years playing in the hills. Paige finished the illustrations for the last pages. Our goal was to finish by Easter, and we have done it. His book is a cross between The Hobbit, John Wayne Westerns, and Hardy Boys mystery books.
At times, it has been an escape to work on these stories. We included a map in the book. I think this is one of my favorite illustrations she did. The blog can’t do it justice.
We are celebrating being alive, celebrating those who have passed away, and celebrating the Savior’s Resurrection this weekend in the sunshine.
I have been in a fog and suspended by grief most of February and March. On Saturday we were moving through the carwash and for a short time, everything came to a halt. It was like the car was doing a reenactment of our experiences of the month. We were stopped, uncertain of the future, anxious, blind to what was ahead, and unable to do a thing about it. I know I was alive during these past weeks, but I don’t remember much. Also, when I say I felt grief, along with some sadness, I physically ached. I have had a few better days recently, and my explanation is grace. Some people might give credit to “time.” I still say it is grace. Time seems meaningless right now, but God’s help is tangible.
Mondays are the definition of possibility. Sundays are about rest and vision and goals, but I set my feet on the path on Mondays. I haven’t met my mistakes of the week yet, so there is less to carry. My boys get back to their routines and I don’t have to wonder where they are. I have a lot on my mind, but it’s manageable in steps. Take courage now, let’s get started.
