Category: Life according to Angela

Homecoming 2016

Look at this young man and this young lady. A lot of effort went into this date. Daniel spent money he earned at work. His date’s dress was altered by a neighbor to add sleeves. Hair, flowers, a day activity, a dinner, and coordinating with other couples who joined them occupied a lot of their time. Cars were washed and vacuumed. Colors were matchy-matchy. One girl in the group provided her date’s shoes and belt. Other girls provided ties for their dates.

So much effort for a dance that was so dark, the music so loud, and the atmosphere so blaring that his date asked to leave early. Chaperones did not stay in the dance room, but were in the halls. Dancing, music, and attire were inappropriate. Daniel’s experiences at every school dance have been the same. He has stepped out every time.

When we lived in Arizona, there was a Mormon Prom, put on by parents and leaders in the Tucson area. Anyone could attend if they followed church standards. It was decorated beautifully, had amazing refreshments, and the lighting wasn’t too dark and the music was appropriate. It was a magnet for many, not just members of the church.

I didn’t think we would need a Mormon Prom in Salt Lake Valley, but here we are. I would be willing to help with an effort to do something beautiful for these kids, providing a more wholesome environment to enjoy the time they have with their dates. They deserve better than what is being offered.

In a time before texting

We were reading the Bible as a family on Monday night and Mark was using my childhood scriptures. He found this note in the pages, written to my friend Thora when I was his age.

This note is one of the earliest surviving documents of the first time I decided to change my name to Angela. Back and forth, Angie and Angela have taken turns my whole life.

It also shows how I had an early interest in animals, which promptly disappeared after I finished a degree in Biology with a Zoology emphasis.

It shows the development of my handwriting style. I think I was imitating someone popular, who was actually very mean.

When Mark found this note he just laughed and handed it to Richard. I cringed and laughed and sent a picture of it to my friend Thora, who still has cute hair, while I still wonder if anyone likes mine. It awakened all sorts of preadolescent demons in my mind.

Be careful what you leave in your scriptures. You never know who will find it.

😉

September favorites

This (edited) movie:

I watched it twice. And liked it both times.

These books:

It’s about aging and dying, medicine and home. It is an important and good read.

This was good because it shatters the idea that we need to build powerful friendships before we can invite people to come to Christ.

This audiobook:

We actually listened to this in August but I keep remembering outrageous quotes. Some sentences you just need to hear to believe. The narrator also has a great Han Solo voice. This is actually not worth your time…unless you are on a long road trip with a preteen, in which case, it is gold.

The Miracle of the Peaches

service
Kenna Hope

Someone said to me as I visited her elderly mother who was ill, “You’re a little young for this job. I think Relief Society presidents shouldn’t be called unless they are much older.” (She meant no harm, only concern for my young family.)

“Yes, I am young,” I agreed. “Yet here I am,” I thought. I do lack some years and life experience and knowledge. However, I have a lot of experiences that indicate that the Lord magnifies our efforts, whatever our age.

Last week I got a call from a man in our congregation. He sounded frantic, “I need your help!” and then the cell phone cut out.

Worried, I called him back, thinking of all kinds of awful possibilities for his call. “I have some peaches from my tree that I need someone to prepare. Can you do it?”

“Yes,” I said, remembering all the times we had offered to help this family, but they said they were fine. I knew this meant he had come to trust me. I also knew I could call many people to help me, but that takes time which I didn’t have. I did ask one person, but she wasn’t available. When I saw there weren’t too many peaches, I decided I could do it on my own…only I had never done it before.

Peaches don’t wait for you. You must deal with them quickly when they are ripe. It was after 8 pm when I had time to face the box of peaches and begin the task. I would be up late, of this I was sure.

At this moment, I saw the little light on my phone blinking. There was a text message from a neighbor telling me that she was canning peaches from 8-10 and inviting me to come over. I had signed up to learn her techniques at a canning presentation back in May. She was apologetic for the late notice; she had found a deal on peaches that afternoon and realized they needed to be canned right away.

I don’t love asking for help at the last minute. I don’t even like making phone calls. But I recognized a miracle happening and I needed to act.

I called her and told her I needed her help, not realizing her ENTIRE kitchen was filled with peaches. She and her husband, over steaming pots and sticky peaches told me over speaker phone, “Sure, bring your peaches. We will make it work.”

And they did. Jeremy washed and blanched. I peeled and cut, and Elizabeth prepared the syrup and packed them in containers. Their son also stayed up late in his pajamas to help. In a little over an hour, the task was done, their own peaches and jars set aside to help a neighbor late at night, with no advance notice.

Yes, I am young, and they are young, but sometimes there are miracles. And because of the peaches, I have strengthened friendships with the man with the peach tree, Elizabeth, and Jeremy.

The best day

Ward party preparations on Friday night

Yesterday was the best day I have had in a long time. I got to speak in church and teach a class. Paige came home for a few hours and we had a nice Sunday dinner. At church I sat on the stand and could see the faces of the women in my congregation that I do not see in Relief Society. Some dear friends were well enough to attend church. The weather was sunny and the colorful mountains startled me with their vibrant red and yellow leaves. It has been four years since I have spoken in church. Sigh. I love writing and public speaking.

Neighborhood party

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(I chose not to post a picture of everyone to avoid posting clear pictures of the neighbor kids.)

We had a wonderful neighborhood party this week. Our neighbors have been through a lot over the past year or so. Nearly every family has dealt with death and/or serious illness. We have come together to mourn and support one another during these times. It was nice to come together to enjoy an outdoor meal. I think they are wonderful neighbors, all. I stayed late, visiting, and came home with a huge bag of produce, a pitcher of homemade root beer, and plans to go on a walk with a neighbor I don’t know well.

 

A late summer outing

Richard’s work party was held last Friday evening at a local theme park. Richard was out of town, so we went without him.

We gathered from the far reaches of our current domains to be together. Paige came up from school in Provo and we met Daniel at his job in Murray. Timothy turned down two invitations from friends to be with us. Mark skipped a baseball practice.

After much ado, we were together, driving up I-15 in the old black minivan. I switched songs on the radio based on the commentary from the back seats. Finally, we resorted to the classical station, only to hear Beethoven’s Moonlight Sonata, its pensive notes contrasting with the mood of the evening. Timothy made a joke about roller coasters in slow motion to match the melody and we all laughed, the frustrations and responsibilities of the day sliding off and revealing a truer version of ourselves.

During that drive, a familiar feeling came to my heart. I felt as I did during our drives in Arizona, seeking homeschool adventure in our old van, years ago. Triggered by the old, well-trod pattern togetherness, we laughed as we heard Timothy and Daniel’s protests against Adele’s songs on every radio station. The voices were deeper and no one was strapped in a car seat, but some essential feeling had come back during the drive.

It made me wonder if I will ever love a stage of life as much those years when we ran around the desert together. It made me sad that I hated the desert so much when we lived there. I didn’t appreciate what a gift that isolation was to our family. I always loved time with the kids, but who knew the backdrop of our adventures would also hold my heart? When will my point of reference for “wonderful” move to a new period in our lives?

I have changed during these four years, living in the mountains. I don’t lead out in adventures with the kids as I used to. Did I impart all my courage to them, or have I redirected my courage to other areas? I have always lived with big fears, but they, too seem to change. A new fear is that the best days with the kids all together are over.

I want to remember this night because it reminded me that despite all that has changed, some essence of our family dynamic remains strong. We still love our times together. I want it to be enough to know that, despite the reality that similar days are rare.

The late summer twilight-lit faces, spinning and rushing through the park that night are a memory I hope will join the ranks of the good old days when I look back on it, years from now. By then, I trust that these bittersweet thoughts will be dulled by time and experience and new joys. The light really was golden on this evening, perfect for capturing and framing good memories.

A good movie

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Richard was going to work a few hours from home today, and I just finished reading the book, Far From the Madding Crowd. I decided to watch the movie by myself on Vid Angel. He sat down to watch the first scene with me and immediately liked what he saw. Work was forgotten and we spent the afternoon watching this beautiful adaptation of Thomas Hardy’s novel together.

It’s good, good, good. It is certainly not as rich as the book, but the cinematography is as beautiful as Thomas Hardy’s descriptions. Most of the lead actors are just right, especially Gabriel Oak and Bathsheba Everdeen.

Lessons, hard-earned

I won’t share the experiences that prompted these lessons learned, but they are mine and maybe one will be helpful to you today.

Don’t forget to season your opinions with love for others.

You can love your opinions too much. These monuments to your “wisdom” and experience can be like idols, blinding you to the greater truths and realities that are all around you. Many truths can only be found through empathy and understanding for others and a willingness to obey God’s will.

When we speak out from a place of emotional pain or anger, it is easy to lose empathy and compassion, because these feelings draw us into ourselves. Anger and pain are part of life, but God is the best one to sort out these feelings with.

What will it matter that I made my point, if I lose a portion of my capacity to love in the process?