Category: Life according to Angela

This little video made me think about my own neighborhood, and the messages I would like to send by my actions to my neighbors.

Bishop Brockbank, our previous bishop, talked a lot about personal ministries. This was many years ago and I was inspired by his words, and began doing things in my neighborhood, not connected to my church responsibilities. I have made time in my schedule for unlikely people. It has made a positive difference in my life, and in the way I view my neighbors. I give time, my talents, and my compassion. These acts are personal and real and treasures to me. You are also my neighbor, dear reader, and I hope you feel that when I write, I care about sharing real things, true things, and about you. Have a wonderful day.

I was never a fan of this moody split pea soup room. Today I am supposed to be cool with Daniel flying halfway across the world without a send-off.  In my cocoon, waiting to become yielded and still, I see that I must get rid of this color. Immediately.

This weekend I learned that I lost the only record I kept of my time as Relief Society president: the calendar with the names of each sister I served every day. In my emotional fog after Daniel left on his mission, I attacked a stack of papers on my desk and tossed them in the recycling, not realizing my calendar must have been among these papers. This is a profound loss to me. I gave up writing in a journal during the years I have served, telling myself that this calendar was to be my record of my time as president. This calendar, God, and I are the only ones who know what I really did during these years, and I have a terrible memory. I have wept on the floor over this loss. Underlying this loss is the fear that what I have done just ascends as smoke and does not matter. But we all know that is nonsense, and in stronger moments than these I will feel better. Acts of love remain, and are never wasted.

I read an interesting article earlier this year about an author and speaker who took back his productivity by carving out one day a week that he labeled, “untouchable.” He allowed no calls, no texts, and no interruptions. He planned for these weekly events sixteen weeks in advance. He analyzed the results of his untouchable days, and he was 10X more productive each week. He has a wife who cared for the kids, so children were not part of his schedule during work hours.

Mothers don’t really get untouchable days, but I have learned that while a whole day may be great, even a few hours alone and untouchable can be helpful. The key for this author and for me has been to make a good plan for the time. Last year, when I wrote my book, my schedule allowed for about three hours a day for personal time. (This many hours was unheard of when I had all the kids at home.) I used one hour for scripture study and two for writing. Years ago, in an Ensign article, a man wrote about his mother who found her productive time was one hour before her ten children got up each day. This was never something I could do without regretting it by 10 am. My untouchable, personal time needs to be in the late morning, after I have done a few jobs around the house so my mind can focus.

I guess with school back in session, I am thinking a lot about productivity and creating good habits. New this year are the little cell phone baskets in the kitchen and we have each made a list of things we want to accomplish with all the time we will have because we are giving our phones a rest. On my list is to write another book and pick up the violin more often. There is a phrase that circulates through the Church of Jesus Christ, and that is that we are trying to raise a “sin resistant generation.” This is a different version of the idea of being “untouchable,” but I believe that taking back our personal time is one way we become spiritually resistant to sin, or untouchable.

Why You Need an Untouchable Day Every Week

A Plea to My Sisters

I placed a few small fabric baskets in the kitchen. These are cell phone beds. This is where my phone stays most of the day. If it is not in my pocket, I don’t check it all the time. This weekend I also turned down my phone for most of the day Saturday. I only answered the most pressing texts. I kept it off during my date with Richard. By eleven o’clock, someone had decided I must be on vacation because I didn’t respond to her texts immediately. I don’t think I should have to be on call all of the time, but the reality is that people expect it because we all carry cell phones. When I take a break, I come back to messages wondering where I am, wondering if I have completed a task, and news, usually bad. Sometimes, I really don’t like my phone.

What do you think about this video? The narrowing sliver of time to create? The absence of stopping cues in social media? Of our tendency to visit sites that make us unhappy three times more often than those that do make us happy? Where do you draw lines with your phone use?