Doll Work 5

There is something I need to fix, but her face is almost the way I like it. I love how her smile turned out. The next step is hair, and I will take some pictures of that process. I think the hair is the biggest hurdle. The trick for me is not to think too much and get trapped in a planning loop. It really just takes some courage to BEGIN.

I finished a really good book this week called Gideon’s Trumpet by Anthony Lewis, which is about the journey toward the right to counsel. It’s only the second book I have ever read about the Supreme Court, and you know what, I loved them both. The other was called The Great Dissent: How Oliver Wendell Holmes Changed His Mind and changed the History of Free Speech in America by Thomas Healy.

Law literature and facial features. These are just two parts of the odd mix knocking around in my head.

Grandma

Will she really be lost to us when she dies? I’m not talking about life after death, but my relationship with her. All my life, if I was lucky, I saw her once a year. Her influence wasn’t so weak as to only be there when we were together. It lived in memory, in letters I still keep, and in her uncanny ability to know when I needed something. Our understanding of one another grew as she revealed her generous nature. She pampered me in childhood, encouraged me as a teen, and mentored me as a young woman.

Wisdom in books and recipes and exchanged notes carried us through the turning point when I could be a help to her. She trusted me to write her story, to help her during an illness, and I sat with her as we drove away from her home for the last time.

Now she withdraws from us, settling into the idea of rest. My hope is that in death she’ll be restored to us more than she is now when I visit her, shrunken and white on her bed. I rouse her sometimes to say goodbye, but lately, I feel strength to let her rest, trusting that the quality of our relationship doesn’t depend upon a goodbye.

Doll work 4

I’m trying a different outfit and have more progress on the face to show today.

The book that I used to learn how to make dolls is called Storybook Toys by Jill Hamor and it is gorgeous and thorough. The embroidery stitches that I use for the face are very basic, the backstitch and satin stitch, and sometimes a French knot for a shine on the eyes. I will use several shades of blue and gray and flecks of gold for the eyes. Right now I have the base shade of one eye finished. Every thread is anchored on the back of the head with tack stitches as I showed you before.

My week will be spent at home, stitching a doll, reading a book about a Supreme Court case, editing more stories for my dad, and cleaning out a bedroom. I will post more progress on the doll when I can. I am still reading more than anything else… good job, me. I wish you the very best week. Let’s hope that you can do something that feeds your soul between the mundane and stressful things.

Doll work 3

This week, it’s been a battle for me to work or move or get going. I haven’t neglected anything important, but every task feels like a chore, and that is a word I do not use. This doll project that I proclaimed would be so great has mostly felt like a burden. Even shopping for doll clothes just made me tired. I think it is common enough to need to slow down in winter. Maybe I should listen to my body and put less on the to do list for a few weeks. I just want to read, and for some reason, I have termed reading an indulgence. Sometimes I don’t realize what an enemy I am to myself by not listening to my needs and pushing through projects that aren’t essential.

Another hard truth is that I am blogging about a doll because it feels safer than writing about the things I am really thinking about. And yet, the thing I decided to embroider first was the smile. That was genuine and reflects how I feel, just as much as admitting to you that I feel sluggish. We can be going through some sad things and still feel joy.

I am trying to learn that it is okay to be a complex person, with deep, marathon thoughts and a spectrum of feeling. I find that reading makes me feel less tired, old, and foreign, but it is often last on my list! 🤦 I doubt I am the only one who regularly denies herself of something good to match an ideal that only exists in the mind. The trick is identifying what feeds your soul and having the courage to make it a priority. I’m so curious what that “something” is for different people, knowing that it likely changes now and then for each of us.

Doll work 2

To embroider a face on a premade doll, I use a doll needle, which is about 5″ long. Thread it with a single long strand of embroidery floss. Working on the back or side of the head, insert the needle and pull it out a few inches from the original entry point, leaving a tail of thread sticking out. Create a small stitch to anchor the thread on the back of the head and repeat the tiny stitch. Next, insert the needle through the existing stitch, through the head, and out of the face, exactly where you want to begin stitching. I am beginning with red thread for the lips. Last, cut off the tail on the back of the head, and remove the doll needle and replace it with an embroidery needle.

For the lips, I will be doing a satin stitch, which is a series of semi-vertical stitches very close together. Since I am working with a single thread, I make a lot of stitches to give the exact effect I want.

This process of making an anchor stitch on the back of the head is repeated in reverse when I am finished with the thread. I rethread the doll needle on the face side and insert it back through the head and make more anchor stitches on the back of the head. Then I insert the needle through the anchor stitch and exit a few inches away and cut off the tail of thread at the surface.

The natural light in the house is fleeting these days! I used the 15 minutes of light we got today to take these photos. I hope to have the face finished by Friday. Hopefully, the sun will come out a little more tomorrow so I can show some progress.

I spent time this week picking out her clothing and narrowing down eye and lip color. I already know she will have orange hair. ♥️

Doll work 1

I am starting another doll. The body is premade and can be found at Hobby Lobby. These are the first steps. I use thin interfacing to trace a face from a book. This same piece of interfacing has been used for many dolls. Next, I pin the interfacing to the face and poke holes with my mark-b-gone (water soluble) pen along the lines to make a dot pattern on the doll’s face. Next, I remove the interfacing, connect the dots, and draw pupils and ears. Now I am read to embroider. Don’t worry about the pen marks. They will disappear in a later step.

Workspace

My dad as a young teen, illustrated by Paige McLaughlin. See her work at paigemclaughlinart.com

For many weeks, Paige and I have been helping my dad work on a big project for the family. He has typed a memoir of his childhood adventures in the rolling hills and rock formations near his home in Pittsburg, CA. Paige is illustrating the stories and I am editing and formatting the book. We are mailing a few stories each week to my siblings and their children, with the goal to print and bind a complete version by early April.

It reminds me of a project that I began in January 2020 to write memories of my childhood. I wrote about 15 or 20 pages before I set it aside. Living in close quarters during the past 10 months has made it a little harder to focus on writing. Plus, I struggle to define a work space. The desks are being used, the kitchen table must be cleared often, and I need extreme quiet. This project with my dad keeps some of my desire to write alive, and inspires me to pick up old projects and not find excuses to delay.

I am making a little progress on creating a portable workspace for myself. I need to be present a lot of the time, not hidden away in an office. So, my work world revolves around a book bag and lightweight storage containers more than a single desk.

Stephen King, in his book about writing, suggests a writer should not have a massive desk that dominates a room because writing is not the primary thing. Living with your family is more important. He thinks a smaller desk in a corner is best. 🙂

“Where there is great love there are always miracles.”

“Where there is great love there are always miracles,” he said at length. “One might almost say that an apparition is human vision corrected by divine love. I do not see you as you really are, Joseph; I see you through my affection for you. The Miracles of the Church seem to me to rest not so much upon faces or voices or healing power coming suddenly near to us from afar off, but upon our perceptions being made finer, so that for a moment our eyes can see and our ears can hear what is there about us always.” –Death Comes for the Archbishop by Willa Cather

There are many passages from this book that made an impression on me. There is much talk everywhere of peace and unity and coming together. Forgive me, but I see little hope of that in the big sphere, but I have seen it happen in my neighborhood, one person at a time choosing to see neighbors with warmth. I am a judgmental person by nature, but find that judgment melts pretty quickly into compassion as I choose to really see a person. I believe Jesus Christ enables us to do this. Some of my best friends are those whom I have judged harshly at the beginning.

I often have something to learn from one who challenges my neatly rowed ideas.

C.S. Lewis talks about a First Friend, one with whom you agree on everything, and a Second Friend, with whom you do not. My “Second Friends” are the ones who helped me know myself better, helped me grow in my ideas, and served me a needed dose of compassion for my differences with them.

“Where there is great love, there are always miracles.” I trust in this.