Category: Life according to Angela

Humboldt Redwoods

We took so many pictures in the redwoods, but with each capture, we grew to understand that the secrets of the forest cannot be taken. The photos are hardly representative of what we saw. I think the redwoods evoke a feeling apart from any other, so the day we took a walk through the trees was a true highlight of our trip.

Nice things: few tourists and nice families, Avenue of the Giants road, playing in the river

Surprise: Someone placed small toy figures in crevices of the bark of trees on the hike and Mark found five of them. This is something we want to do for others on a future nature hike.

RV Park: this was our nicest campground, but we kind of panicked when the bathrooms were closed for a long, long, long time. They had a nice gift shop and delivered ice to our site. There was a pond and living turtle and fish inside the gift shop. We were the only pop-up trailer in a park full of big RVs. There were many toy breed dogs traveling in RVs.

Menu: stew and biscuits, fresh chocolate chip cookies, lots of oranges, PBJ sandwiches, a restaurant called Peppers

Half Moon Bay

We arrived at Half Moon Bay after dark on a Sunday night. We set up quickly and fell asleep to the sound of waves. It was so dark, we couldn’t know how close we were to the water, and looked forward to the morning to reveal where we had landed.

In the morning, the beach was ours to claim, cold and beautiful, and we did claim it, most of us in a commando crawl on the sand to stay warm and out of the wind. Mark, of course, took on the waves with little boy zeal in a longer, leaner version of himself than the last time he was at the beach. I knew I was watching some of the last of his childhood as he moved to attack the waves with kicks and leaps. He will be more reserved next time. I will brace myself for that.

Two favorite memories from this leg if the trip: an eclectic and well-stocked used bookstore and an old fashioned diner.

Good surprises from Half Moon Bay: a new friend at the campground named Dave, flowers everywhere along the path to the beach, Daniel’s videos of Mark, and we became faster at folding up the pop-up trailer each time.

Menu: chicken salad on pitas, breakfast burritos, pizza, diner food, roasted hot dogs, and cinnamon sugar doughies by Mark and Richard

Essentials: jackets, heater, books, magazines

Favorite conversation: at Grandma Ruth’s house about “The List” of things she is not supposed to eat anymore.

 

 

Coasts

We are on an epic road trip through northern California with a pop-up trailer. Paige is settled in Manhattan. Richard has seen both coasts this week. It’s a new time for all of us, and the person I see in the mirror and photos seems different. It could be new experiences, age, cares, and possibly the camping hair.

 

 

Joyful Celebration

 

Most of us will never know what it is like to lead the class procession at graduation and give the valedictory speech, but I can say that being Daniel’s mother this evening felt pretty great. I felt distant among all the conversations and congratulations with friends, I think because I was busy finding dedicated places in my heart for all that this evening meant to me. Now, late at night, I am going through pictures, alternately smiling to myself and drying tears.

Tonight was one of the last nights it will be possible to have all of our children together for a few years. Paige left for New York tonight, accompanied by Richard, and she’ll come back just in time to say goodbye to Daniel before he leaves on his mission.

On my shelf in the kitchen, I just placed a sign that says “Gather,” but I keep thinking that the more fitting word for us this summer is “Fly.”

 

Superpowers Required

There was a big meeting scheduled this week for my calling. We were asked to “arrange our schedules” so we could attend. This phrase read in my mind, “It will be a sin to miss it.” The problem was, this meeting was at the same time as the Senior awards night. I felt the urgency of the message to fix my schedule, and wondered if God expected me to miss an important part of graduation. I mean, my ancestors left their countries and families to cross the plains and serve missions. Here it was again: the call of church and family, ringing in all parts of my mind, not in harmony, but dissonant and out of sync. This interpretation of events is no one’s fault but my own. No meeting is worth the angst I felt, but it illustrates the way I and many women face the world. We interpret invitations as commandments and feel regret when we can’t do everything. Compound this with the question, is there anything worse than a mother who doesn’t show up for her kids? Mothers are needed more than presidents, but I need to feel my choices are actually mine to make. I believe I usually choose the right option after some thought and talking it out. Of course I would choose my son, but in my mind, I was wrestling to know if it was God’s will or mine that made me think I should choose the meeting. In the end, I chose my son and was thankful that my Father in Heaven gave me counselors to cover meetings I can’t attend.

I don’t believe I need to do more things to be of worth. But independent of my worth, I want to be useful, and that means I need to do the right things. It feels like super powers are required sometimes. Sometimes I am torn in big ways, but other times I think it is funny what I am asked to do. This week included the following:

I was asked to help with an essay, but I was not allowed to read the rough draft.

I needed to visit a home full of dogs, but focus on the people, not the beloved dog biting my feet during the visit.

I was asked to demonstrate Timothy’s electric guitar since I am the only one in the house who plays the guitar. Never mind that I can’t play Metallica.

And of course, I needed to be in two places at once, or at least I felt that way until I let it go and delegated the responsibility to someone else. I think this is the freedom that I was looking for this week. My Father in Heaven has everything in place to make things work for busy moms at church.

Gratitude in May

I am able to keep windows open all day lately, and the sounds of the breeze swirling our great cottonwood trees and the fresh air somehow dispel the busy feelings and replace them with grateful feelings. Consistently, I feel grateful for trees and green and warmer air.

May 7-13

  • grilled hamburgers and a lovely salad
  • clean sheets and bathrooms
  • Elder Kearon’s devotional
  • time to read on Tuesday
  • my neighbor was able to come over and hear her daughter perform a violin piece
  • Taste of Home chicken pot pie
  • passport work finished
  • the quilting ladies
  • the trees we had to cut down: Thank you for the beauty.
  • productive days
  • a quilt for Morgan
  • our bishop’s miraculous recovery
  • piano duets played by our sons
  • Mother’s Day magnets from Daniel

May 14-20

  • Paige’s Mother’s Day card
  • open windows and fresh air
  • Charlene Kettle
  • Excedrin
  • Sunday evening walk with Richard
  • 2 days outdoors at a tournament
  • NYC tickets ready
  • Mediterranean salad at Wendy’s
  • Mark is twelve.
  • Sunday night gathering of my boys on the bed to talk to me
  • Mark singing in the choir
  • Mark playing Uptown Funk and Indiana Jones on the trumpet
  • Tim’s jazz band recordings from Richard
  • passport arrived
  • dinner from my counselors when I was sick

Jazz, Art, Band, Choir, Twelve, AP

Richard and I had plans to go to Timothy’s jazz band dinner dance this week, but I was sick and had to miss it. Mark went in my place. I really missed out on a great evening! Timothy was able to play with some seasoned jazz musicians and play some of my favorite big band music. He is the trombone player on the second row in the video.

Today is Mark’s 12th birthday. I am happy for him, and a little sad for me. This week he displayed some work in an art show, played trumpet in a band concert, and sang in a choir concert. I couldn’t get a good photo of him in the back of the band. However, I bet you can spot him easily in the choir. He is ambivalent about the choir experience for many reasons, one being his section.

It’s the Fathers and Sons campout tonight, so we will celebrate Mark tomorrow night with all the good things.

Each day but one this week Daniel or Timothy took AP tests. I tried to warn them, but they took the classes and tests anyway. 😉

 

 

Old, Last, and New

Losing trees is one of the saddest things. The previous owners’ daughters called this grove and the stepping stone path through the periwinkle “the beautiful.” I will miss the flicker of light filtering through the leaves. It hurt my heart to see two trees go, but aspens don’t live forever. The trees really called to me when we looked at this house the first time, and I feel some nostalgia for the days when there were tall aspens lining the path.

Speaking of moving to Utah, that was almost six years ago. Leaving Tucson meant leaving the incredible piano ensemble experiences our kids had every spring, where they played duets on a stage with twelve grand pianos. There is nothing on this scale here, but there are “monster concerts” the kids play in the mall with five pianos. It was nice to hear the boys perform duets together one last time before Daniel leaves.

We came home from the monster concert to discover that the corsage Daniel ordered for prom was the wrong color and the flowers were wilting, so I made my first wrist corsage on Saturday. I felt more stress about this corsage than I thought was possible over some flowers and glue. Daniel went to prom with McKenna and I just hoped the flowers would stay on that wrist corsage all evening. I probably should have hoped he would have fun, but that was a given since he was with McKenna and happy friends.