Instead of, “Bow to your partner,” my brother Paul the caller said, “Pose for the camera.” 😂
Our family reunions are over, there is one week until the wedding (pray!), Mark is on Pioneer Trek (pray!), and Timothy flies to Guam in two weeks to begin his missionary work there (pray!). I have exerted so much mental labor over Mark’s piano teacher dilemma and school schedule dilemma that I must have burned some calories with those mighty thoughts. Also, I am laboring to find a new counselor in the stake Primary after Susan’s passing. This is difficult spiritual work.
I have been reading in 2 Chronicles this week. I am trying not to be overly worried or stressed about all that is going on, but sometimes I just swim in concerns. When I read these scripture verses, the words center me a little.
“For the eyes of the Lord run to and fro throughout the whole earth, to shew himself strong in the behalf of them whose heart is perfect [completely] toward him.” 2 Chronicles 16:9
“For the battle is not yours, but God’s.” 2 Chronicles 20:15
Recently, I awoke very early with a predictable headache from little sleep. I prayed for help, as I had hit a real limit in capacity. The relief came suddenly and completely, beyond what I expected.
Also recently, I prayed on a Sunday morning that I could speak to a particular friend at church. I really needed some insight only she could give. I arrived early to the meeting, prepared to seek her out. She sat down in the seat I had saved, even before I could wave to her and welcome her. Then, the meeting ended 10 minutes early so there was extra time to talk. Her words were incredibly helpful and a specific answer to my prayer.
I don’t think that prayer is like a vending machine, where you just enter your code and money and expect the exact thing you want will drop. But, I have seen that prayers offered during painful times are met with particular tenderness. I have also seen that prayers asking for specific helps towards a solution are effective. This was the case in this prayer to be able to speak with a friend. I didn’t ask that my dilemma just go away, but that I could be given insights in a casual, friendly talk.
My stress is still there, and sometimes I still can’t sleep. My dilemma isn’t completely solved, but these recent answers to prayer are like stepping stones, indicating a path, and the presence of God in my life.
Sometimes, probably most times, the blessings come without my asking. Last week, Paige and Michael came over to help care for Richard’s apple tree. After they bagged hundreds of baby apples, without being asked, they cleared the debris from the backyard which fell during a terrible windstorm. They filled three wheel barrows full of twigs and branches and carried them off the lawn. They were such a blessing that day. Yard work has been a big part of my life lately as we prepare for a wedding celebration, and those branches were a setback. Hooray for inspired and helpful children, and a Father in Heaven who is in the details.
Each member of my Primary presidency brings something unique and strong to the team. Susan brought enthusiasm, humor, and great quotes. Shelby brings warmth and resolute testimony. Anne brings evidence of her deep thinking and a faith that has been tried and fortified. I could list many more things for each person, and Anne also consistently brings music to our meetings. This week, as we met without Susan, and with the shock of her sudden passing still with us, Anne played this song. ♥️
We had one last goodbye and thank you to our piano teacher who moved away this month. Mark is the only one still taking lessons, but Paige and Daniel joined us to say goodbye. Natalie was an incredible teacher for our kids.
A reunion of Young Women leaders to bid farewell to Deor who is going on a mission.
GARTH BROOKS CONCERT Our tickets were not together, but we rode together on the train into Ute territory. (Note Richard Jaussi’s t-shirt.)
waiting for the wind to die down
We loved the concert. Once Mark graduates from high school I will be auditioning as a fiddler for Garth’s band. 😉
This is my friend Susan who passed away today. She served as my second counselor in the stake Primary presidency until the end of her life. Today I just keep thinking of the hundreds of children she taught over a 32-year career at our neighborhood elementary school, mostly as a kindergarten teacher, then as a third grade teacher. Walking into a room with her was like being with a rock star. Children would light up and run to her. One day a teenage boy, her former student, saw her visiting a Primary and ran into the room to hug her.
I keep thinking of her family. I keep thinking of the things she taught me. What a giant spirit in such a tiny person. Her influence is everywhere. Well done, darling Susan! I will miss you until we meet again.
“But David encouraged himself in the Lord his God.”
1 Samuel 30:6
David was in a pretty bleak situation, and people around him were grieved. “But David encouraged himself in the Lord his God.”
This is my personal scripture phrase of the week.
1. I can encourage myself, and not wait around for someone to fix things.
2. I can trust the Lord’s strength, not my own.
Last week, my favorite scripture phrase was,
“I perceive that ye are weak”
3 Nephi 17:2
The Lord does know that I am weak, but I find comfort in this: the same “weak” people who couldn’t understand all that the Lord had to share, Jesus also told them they had “great faith.” (3 Nephi 19:35)
I love when people are described by really different adjectives in the scriptures. Everyone has a lot of dimensions to their character, and the Lord understands this about us. He knows we are not perfect (complete) and being weak doesn’t mean we can’t have greatness in other areas. Being weak can also be the impetus for great faith.
I found this Etsy artist who makes cross stitch patterns of miniature masterpieces (2″x3″). I am addicted to these tiny projects. I think this activity helps me to go blank for a while, and just focus on counting and color. Do you sometimes need to go blank for a while, too?
Art like this brings back memories of hearing these stories for the first time in the 1970’s from records and my mom reading from the illustrated Children’s Bible.
The story of Gideon is my favorite in the book of Judges. When I taught seminary, I remember shocking my early morning students by smashing a clay pot in my living room where we met, just like Gideon’s army smashed their pitchers. With trumpets, shattering pottery, lights, and voices, Gideon’s 300-man army surprised the host of sleeping enemies, “The sword of the Lord and of Gideon!” and their enemy was destroyed. This might have been the only day my students left seminary more awake than when they arrived, except maybe the day we cast “stones” at a life-sized mural of Goliath.
This week as I studied Gideon’s story, I focused on two contrasting verses during the exchange between the angel of the Lord and Gideon about his call to deliver Israel, verses 12 and 15.
The Lord sees Gideon as a mighty man of valor, while Gideon sees himself as poor and unimportant. Pretty much my only takeaway this week from Bible study is enough: God knows who we truly are, who we were before we came to earth, and who we can become. He sends messengers to remind us that He is with us.
I have had a few messengers in my life who have helped me live with courage. One was a friend named Jody who told me that I had the capacity to homeschool my kids. Bishops and stake presidencies have also been messengers of the Lord’s confidence in me, and reminded me that the Lord would be with me. Perhaps the most common messengers are the people who trust me to listen to them and help them. When a friend opens her heart to me, I see this is as a call to valor. Today, we help rescue Israel one by one
When Mark helps me decorate the kitchen for summer, we tend toward maximalism.
This cold week, I feel more like making a cozy beef stew than anything else. Truly, that’s on the menu tonight. So weird. We decorated for summer, despite the snow and nonsense. Summer decorations in the kitchen signal good times ahead.
I am doing a little quilt work each day this week. I have set up my sewing station in the kitchen so I can come and go easily, or sew a few seams while I wait for something to cook. This strategy is working, and the blocks are stacking up.
This blog is the tiniest window into what I do and think. You certainly won’t learn about my stance on current events here. I hope that is refreshing.
