From the kitchen window

DSC_9196Last night’s fog made this spectacular sight this morning:

DSC_9202Every tiny branch, carefully frosted and shimmery. I love that we have this forest in our backyard.

DSC_9199Beautiful!

Year in Review

I love commencements, commemorations, lists, and encapsulating things. I’m an organizer, and the close of the year makes me itchy to craft a denouement for the year’s events.

Richard thinks that 2012 was our biggest year. I feel tired just thinking about all that we have done. Maybe I’m too tired to write the perfect summation, but I will try to give words to some of my thoughts about our year.

2012 was the end of an era for us. We had spent 15 years living outside of Utah and now we had an opportunity to come home. Our hearts weren’t always drawn to Utah. We loved the adventures that we found on our own and the people in Texas and Arizona. But our perceptions and needs changed in the past few years, making the answer to an offer to move to Salt Lake an obvious “Yes!”

With our move, we found that we could now drop in on Grandma when we felt like it and be at family events, big and small.  No longer would temples be hours away; we could now drive 10 or 15 minutes and find ourselves in a temple of our choice. Our Utah neighbors are also fellow ward members, and this added dimension of relationship makes me realize how much I missed being understood and known by my neighbors in other states.

2012 brought us back to community. When we made the decision to put the kids in public school, it broke my heart, but we were strongly and explicitly led by the Spirit in our decision. I gave up cherished career. All I ever wanted to do was teach and be with my kids, and for 11 years I felt blessed that I could do it. The compensation for my personal sense of loss is this concept of community. I find a lot of fulfillment helping with reading and homework in the school. I love the halls of our elementary school. I love the teachers. I love the kids. On my birthday, which also happened to be election day, I sat in the hallway of the school, listening to children read to me. A steady flow of people came through the doors, heading to the polls. I had only been in town for 2 months, but I knew so many of those people because I had met them at school and church. These people knew me as a neighbor and a ward member, and many had helped counsel me as we made the decision to change to public school. Their warm hellos that day were a perfect gift.

My heart, while yearning for my children, has been filled with a love for those who teach them. I have learned that being a community member isn’t just about giving, it’s about receiving, too. The generosity and power of this community centers in the church and schools. I had watched our Arizona community splinter over education, an effect of which was manifested in my group of young women who didn’t know one another because almost every girl attended a different form of school. Although I knew and respected the circumstances for all of these different school choices, I was sorry that the girls were missing an element of community in their lives. I also watched the already sparse home schooling community splinter over a religious divide. I didn’t realize how divided our previous community was until I jumped into our new one.

You readers know how much we tried to be valuable community members during our years our home schooling, and you will also know how much we loved our previous neighbors. Our new community and decisions about schools are based on current and personal needs. It does not erase the love we had for people wherever we lived or diminish the experiences we enjoyed in home school. We have learned to respect personal decisions about education.

2012 brought a change in Richard’s career path, a culmination of many years of effort in his field. Nobody outside work really knows what Richard does, but it involves signal processing and communications, and he is good at it. He’s doing things in his new job that he has wanted to do for years. Hooray for our quiet hero, our breadwinner and anchor in our home.

2012 brought extreme physical, emotional, and spiritual demands. I am still dealing with a bit of anxiety which began after I got heat stroke during youth conference. Richard and I found that living in different states for so many weeks during the move drew us closer emotionally. The kids had to stretch in enormous ways as they became acclimated to public school and found new friends. We have had more reasons to ask for priesthood blessings this year than ever, and these blessings have been a real source of strength and help.

2012 had few constants. Our definition and location of our beloved home changed. Our callings changed. In January, I was Young Women president. Richard was on the high council. Now I am a Mia Maid advisor. Richard has a calling to help facilitate the new youth curriculum, i.e. help the new teachers incorporate the videos and teaching methods. We have a new climate. Our wardrobes and bedding have taken completely new forms. We are not together as often. We have new music and dance teachers and a new instrument in our home. We have unannounced visitors all of the time. Even our day for Family Home Evening has had to change. Perhaps the only constants are the people we kiss good night and our faith, but how comforting that through all this change, we have had each other.

We have needed people this year, and family and friends have carried us. Generosity in so many forms has graced our lives. Being a recipient of service helped me to find an appropriate place to put some old anger. We are surrounded by extended family who enrich our lives.

When I told Richard that I would marry him, I remember saying that we’d have a wonderful life together. Who knew what things we would experience over the years, especially during the big year of 2012, but it has been wonderful. I find that although I resist change, learning to embrace each season is a beautiful way to live.

Thank you for reading, blog friends and family. Happy New Year!

 

A Very Special Celebration

We threw a family Christmas party last night at our house. My mom and I worked on it for about 6 weeks. Here are some photos from the evening.

Place cards for 36 people

DSC_9144Special cookies, most of them decorated by Paige.

DSC_9140Centerpiece and place settings

DSC_9134The little girls’ table

DSC_9135Mom and Dad

DSC_9105My Aunt Kate and her family

DSC_9109Joe’s family

DSC_9120Paul and Care looking great.

DSC_9106Paul and Care and the kids.

DSC_9127Susan and Richard’s family

DSC_9101Sarah and Bryan

DSC_9108Derrick

DSC_9129Happy Stacy

DSC_9131Little David

DSC_9130

DSC_9148I loved the family talent show after dinner. The Christmas pageant was beautifully costumed by Susan. The gifts were generous and so much fun.

DSC_9142Happy 39th anniversary! We hope you love the carolers, Mom.

Merry Christmas!

 

The Family Dinner Table

I believe in the family dinner ritual. Unfortunately, most nights we are missing one or two people, but I don’t give up. Having everyone around me, being nourished and sharing is the highlight of my day.

Empty chairs make me sad.

Dinner is not always a special occasion. My cooking, our moods, and The Schedule get in the way, but I think that the “dinner time at the table ritual” is special because you can count on it, not because it’s always perfect or fun. My family knows that there will be a meal and that I will expect them to answer a few questions about their day.

Richard fixed two of our broken chairs so we have enough seating for everyone. I love that he did this. I love these old uncomfortable chairs.

I served some leftover baked ziti to the kids around the dinner table last night. My first surprise was that they engulfed it. The next surprise was the conversation that happened as we ate.

We were all feeling comfortable and happy. Mark said, “Mom, our family is different than any other family because our handwriting has monkey tails (I taught the kids to write D’Nealian style), we go to Spring Lake where we have a dinner bell, and we say, ‘Is everybody happy?’ ‘Well, I should say!'”

And so our conversation turned to things which define our family.

Tim added, “We don’t have DS or PS3 or XBox or anything like that and we get really excited about seeing our extended family.”

Daniel said, “We study really hard and we are good students.”

We were interrupted at this point, but I would have added, “We try really hard to make dinner time a good family time.”

I need to remember this little dinner scene to help me press on and keep trying to find ways to sit down together at this table.

I read someplace that the family dinner table is like an altar in the home. It’s a place to teach, train, gather for prayer, and grow in love. It can help families stay together. Amen.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas

I am enjoying finding new places for our decorations. This year we gained two mantels and a banister. We lost our tall ceilings, but gained built-in bookshelves.

I’m not sure what I’m doing with mantel #2 downstairs.

We had to get rid of our tall tree when we moved, but luckily we still have the tree that Richard and I bought 17 years ago at an after Christmas sale at Ben Franklin. That makes the cost of the tree about $3.50 a year. Bargain!

Innocence on September 11th

photo taken just days before September 11, 2001

Somehow it’s therapeutic to retell where we were when terrible events happened. I was home in Austin, Texas with little Paige and Daniel and a neighbor baby on the morning of September 11, 2001. As the news spread, another neighbor left her babies with me as she ran to the school to pick up her daughter. I gathered the five innocents on the little toddler bed in our school room and turned off the television that replayed events too terrible for them to see. I was grateful that our home was a safe haven for the children who were in my care that day. That evening I put on my Cub Scout uniform and spent time with the Cub Scouts, talking and listening, numb and sad, but feeling the pride of that American flag on the uniform. I have always felt grateful that I was surrounded by innocent children on that day.

 

Snippets

We have some lovely grapes in the backyard which the kids have enjoyed eating.

Richard has a new lawn edger.

All of the kids are registered for school. Yes, this was one of the most difficult things I have ever done. I know it’s the right thing to do, but I’m not talking about it, so please don’t ask.

Most of the boxes are unpacked, but we don’t have many pictures hung.

My favorite parts of our house are the kitchen, mudroom, backyard, and the basement library.

We have had different neighbors stop by nearly every single night to bring us goodies to welcome us.

Daniel is part of a thriving scout troop and Deacon’s quorum.

When you walk out of Paige’s school, three temples are in view.

Yesterday Paige and I filled two five-gallon buckets with therapeutic weeds.

ALL people want to talk about here is education. They ask our name and then they ask the names of our children’s teachers. Pretty much. I think it’s a good sign that the community is so invested in their schools.

I discovered someone with whom I can quote Shakespeare.

The neighbors said that a general authority lived in this house 10 years ago.

Our closets are improving, thanks to help from my parents and Joe.

Life is much easier with good shopping nearby.

I love the evenings here.

I am very grateful to be here. The timing was perfect for our family.

Daniel starts school tomorrow. The rest of the kids begin on Monday.

If you wonder what we are doing, we are either playing in the backyard, playing with boxes and styrofoam, organizing, or eating goodies from the neighbors.

 

We celebrated our girl and our house

We enjoyed some family time to celebrate Paige’s Sweet 16. Everyone signed a book for Paige and she received many thoughtful gifts. We filled the house with people who love her. Aunts, uncles, cousins, brothers, parents, and grandparents were all there to cheer as she reached this milestone.

For entertainment, we gave house tours and the girl cousins tried on Paige’s ballet costumes. The boy cousins played in the moving boxes.

Paige’s license will be delayed a bit because of our move, but at least somebody can drive around in our yard. These are some of Paige’s cousins. Too cute.