Here are some links to articles that have given me something to think about this month.
“Fundamental to looking after someone is finding where they came from and what they need.” This service to displaced women in Iraq really touched me.
Some of the benefits of writing are shared in this article. For the first two links, I thank Catherine.
This piece describes what it’s like to be a high school student, and it’s not about peer pressure and drugs. It’s about teacher-student relationships and restricted movement.
Mark and I needed these graphics a few weeks ago to show relative sizes of objects in the solar system.
Stephanie led me to this article that turned my heart. Go ahead and give those tall boys some candy on Halloween.
If you need a smile, here are some monsters for your Halloween delight, drawn by second graders and embellished by high school students. Brilliant! This one was from Russ.
Today these two boys spoke in church. It was Timothy’s last Primary program. How did that happen? We really enjoyed hearing all of the children speak and sing for us, but there is something special about being able to claim a few of them as our own.
Each boy carefully wrote and memorized his part. They were confident and prepared.
Here is a small quote from each boy today:
In our pre-mortal life we had free agency. Before we were born we chose to follow the Savior.
Satan had a different plan. He wanted everyone to follow him and be forced to obey. This is a bad plan because we wouldn’t be able to choose for ourselves.
The earth was made so we could gain bodies and be tested. It’s important to make our own choices on earth because it tests our faith. If we make good choices, we can be with Heavenly Father and our families in heaven.
-Mark, age 8
Part of the plan was that the Savior would die for us. This helps us all the time, at school, at home, and everywhere. We can repent and always have a good example to follow in Jesus Christ.
Part of the plan is to be baptized and receive the Holy Ghost. The Holy Ghost has helped me in my life. I have learned that I can pray before tests and things I have to do at school and other places. When I do this, I am reassured that I will do well. Every time I have done this, I have passed the test. When we are sad, the Holy Ghost can comfort us. I know that the Savior understands what we are going through and helps us return to Heavenly Father.
I’m still living with pain. I’m not going to share details, but I want to share what these weeks have taught me.
1. I am a hopeful person. I keep telling myself that tomorrow will be a better day, and that seems to help. Hope is powerful.
2. Pain makes me become so self-centered and it’s an awful feeling. One day this week someone called and asked me to help them with some sewing. I was so grateful for the relief from thinking about myself! Providing service is a blessing, even (and especially) for those who have troubles of their own.
3. There are people to help me. I have decided to be more proactive and seek help from a specialist, if necessary. When I showed up for some lab work, my Relief Society President was working there and helped me, and that was a tender mercy to help me to feel encouraged and understood.
4. Our lives and our bodies are a gift, no matter what we are feeling. I am grateful for shadow and light, pain and comfort, joy, and a little sorrow because every season can reveal God’s hand in my life.
Timothy earned some extra money this summer because he got a job mowing a neighbor’s lawn. He has been faithful and hard-working. I know it was a challenging thing for him to do, but he didn’t act like it was.
Timothy is a saver. He decides what he wants and takes the time to save for it. He bought a Lego set last week that he’s been working for all summer. After he built it, we decided it was terribly overpriced. I almost want to write a letter to Lego. Their profit margin is over 30% and when I think of all the hours and labor that this boy gave for that disappointing set, I am a little frustrated. Timothy is happy, but I think he has learned to be a little more cautious.
I read Middlemarch by George Eliot earlier this year and since then, this title has been suggested reading on my Amazon account. I got it from the library but ended up buying a copy of my own so I could write my thoughts in the margins.
This book is partly a memoir of the Mead’s life, describing how Middlemarch has been a part of her life since she was a teenager and how her understanding of the book has changed over time. There is a bit of character analysis from Middlemarch, too. Most interesting to me was how Mead explores George Eliot’s life, highlighting experiences that would have helped her create the characters in Middlemarch.
I liked the thoughts about raising young men, reaching middle age, the landscapes of childhood, and the value of home life. I think you could enjoy this if you haven’t read Middlemarch*. I totally understood the feelings of kinship the author has with her favorite book. My favorite book, although it isn’t Middlemarch, has has taught me many lessons over the years.
Just a smattering of thoughts today, readers.These super hero prints were a gift to the kids from the artist, Josh Talbot. We bought my new violin from his wife.I love pumpkins, and pumpkins from a friend are especially nice.Welcome to our house!Photo is from Halloween 2006
There are fewer costumes to get ready for Halloween this year. When I think back to the years when we coordinated costumes for the kids, I feel thankful that we made those memories. Super Heroes, The Wizard of Oz, and Star Wars were my favorite themes. I spent a little time sewing Halloween bunting over the fall break. Mark has been my helper to decorate the house. One day he spent an hour wrapping little skeletons in t.p. so they would look like mummies. He emphasized to me that the mummies are NOT for the house, but special for his room. Mark and I found this to be a mutually agreeable use for the mummies.
Mark told us that he didn’t need help with his tie. Okay.
The kids had a piano recital this weekend. Paige played the Mendelssohn Concerto in g minor op. 25, 1st movement. Daniel played Maple Leaf Rag by Joplin and a nice contemporary concerto called Concerto Bravo by Olsen. Timothy played Bach’s Solfeggietto and a piece called Frenzy. Mark surprised us again with very expressive dynamics in Spy Bot (He’s a real showman!) and amazed us with his speed at playing Cinnamon Popcorn. The older kids who played concertos were accompanied by their teacher, who spent a lot of extra time working with them on their pieces. She’s in the photo with the kids.
Mark’s measurement robot. I can’t tell you how many times this robot comes to my mind when I am working in the kitchen.
Home school with Mark is comfortable, sweet, and a joy. I’m savoring the time with him. Our studies follow a familiar path through ancient history, math facts, science, and writing. With each child, however, there is zeal for different favorite subjects and I enjoy seeing Mark’s personality and strengths emerge as we work on projects. Mark is good company, and we have the best conversations, and by that I mean we talk through a depth and breadth of his thoughts about super heroes, Star Wars, planets, Calvin and Hobbes, and Harry Potter. I write down some of the things he says as a keepsake of this time together.
On another front…
I find sharing my faith on Facebook to be very tricky. I admire people who can share concise, genuine statements about their testimonies. One thing I am thinking about is how to convey my testimony more effectively (online, among friends) without sounding like a Puritan or shaking so much in my boots. I posted the following paragraph on Facebook, but didn’t get any “LIKES” from my friends of other faiths. Does this mean I sounded like a Puritan to them? Who knows.
The LDS missionaries in our area needed some teaching practice so they picked our family. I loved how they taught and shared their love for the gospel of Jesus Christ. I wish I had invited someone to join us. Next time you see the missionaries, consider listening to their message with an open heart and mind. It will make your day. Their message is the most important part of my life.
Do you have thoughts about sharing your faith online?
I write this as the missionaries sit outside with Richard at a correlation meeting. They are around our house a lot. I am NEVER prepared when they come. One day I walked into the kitchen after showering, looking for a hair brush in my purse. It wasn’t until I had loaded the dishwasher while sporting wet, messy hair that I noticed that the missionaries were in the next room watching me make a fool of myself. Today they have to sit outside because every living area in the house is full of toys and friends. I just never know when they are going to show up.
This is probably one reason people respond well to online missionary work. I just need to learn how to do it better. Really, do you have suggestions?
I make TO DO lists because if I don’t, I’ll forget something, such as a ballet recital (I’ve done this), Scout workshop, or that we’ve run out of frozen corn. My lists allow me to be prepared and achieve goals. However, lately I can’t get through my lists. They are too long and there are so many directions we are being pulled.
One night last week I lay in bed and began going over the unfinished things on my lists. We are involved in baseball, piano, orchestra, band, two musicals, school, home school, scouts, shed and fence building, rewiring part of the house, and teaching violin. The errands and time associated with these activities are significant. Church, school, and music are the priorities these days, so most of my ignored tasks involved housework. The cluttered corners of the house seemed to project themselves before my mind and taunt me. Then I decided to stop the nonsense be kind to myself.
I reflected on the things I HAD done. I was glad that I had spent time with each family member, made dinner, and learned something. I thought of the progress I had made (small) on a personal goal. I closed my eyes and went to sleep peacefully. My unfinished projects could wait for a later time.
I have learned that season changes affect my energy levels. The summer-autumn change is most significant for me. I slow down and often have a few health issues emerge because the adrenaline of summer activities is gone. This season change has been no different. I am struggling with some pain (nothing to worry about), but being gentle with myself when things on my list get pushed to another day.
On Saturday the boys and I went down for an afternoon at Spring Lake. We stayed a lot longer than we expected because the boys (especially Mark) were having such a great time. We hauled trash, dug holes, moved dirt and rocks, poured cement, and admired the house. This is the area where they will build a deck next week. There is a lot of prep work and a concrete retaining wall to build. The big hole in the ground is to manage drainage off the house and hill. It was a great activity for younger boys. Daniel was the cement mixer and Grandpa’s right hand man.
We shopped at probably 20 stores before finding this dress. It didn’t require any alterations to make it modest. Hooray!
As I made alterations to Paige’s most recent school dance dress, I thought, “There must be a special reward in heaven for this work to keep my daughter covered.” I’m hoping for a comfortable room where there are endless romantic comedies playing and the chocolate is without calories. 😉 Modesty is a huge topic, but today, I’m just talking about dresses.
An invitation to a dance means that we will spend a lot of time looking for a dress which will need some alterations after we find it. Formal dresses rarely have sleeves, backs, or adequate fronts. Short dresses are too short. Always. This means that it will take some significant effort to find or make something nice. Young men need to understand this and ask young women several weeks before the dance.
It is easier to find a modest dress in Utah than in other states that I have lived, but they are rarely flattering. At one store in our mall, there is whole wall of the same dress in a variety of colors. They have sleeves, but the dresses are expensive and boring. Most often, the solution is to buy something that your daughter is not comfortable wearing and then fix it so it covers her. These are the strategies that I have seen to fix a sleeveless or short dress:
Wear a t-shirt: the girl will wear a cap sleeve t-shirt beneath the dress in an (almost) matching color or contrasting color. The problem with this is that cotton jersey knit isn’t in the same league with satin or chiffon. It’s really awkward looking. But if I see a girl who has decided that this is the best way for her to feel covered and comfortable, I say it’s better than nothing! Paige wore a satin shirt under a dress once and it was a nicer solution than a t-shirt.
Wear a bolero: the girl will simply place a bolero jacket over the sleeveless or strapless dress, and voila! She is covered. The problem with this is that it’s not original and bolero jackets don’t always match the style of the dress.
Make sleeves or inserts from fabric that doesn’t quite match: It’s impossible to match dress fabric perfectly. The sheen or the shade will be slightly off, and that’s annoying. One year we bought an inexpensive dress at Ross and put an insert in the front. The insert didn’t quite match, but it reflected 5 hours of shopping, so we called it a triumph.
It’s difficult to find fabric to match your dress.
Make sleeves from fabric from the dress: If you are lucky, you might have some pockets or a few extra inches of fabric you can remove from the sides or bottom of the dress with which you can construct sleeves. This is my favorite solution because no one can tell that you have reworked the dress.
We bought this dress even though it was sleeveless and 12 sizes too big because it was a good length and we could make sleeves with the extra fabric after alterations.
Buy the dress several sizes too big so its length is adequate. It means you need to alter the dress, but as I mentioned earlier, 99% of short dresses are too short, so this is a real solution.
Wear a lacy underskirt: For short dresses, one trend is to wear a lacy underskirt that extends below the hemline of the dress, making it look like a slip is showing. I’ve also seen how girls have sewn wide ribbons to the hem to lengthen the hemline. It was pretty.
Make the dress yourself: Sewing skills are a blessing. If it’s not your thing and you have someone in your life who can make something from scratch, hooray!
Modest dresses are not easy to find, even for young girls. I made this dress in Arizona because we couldn’t find anything in stores. While shopping for patterns, I met another mother who was trying to teach herself how to make sleeves for her daughter’s strapless prom dress. We shared a moment of camaraderie and panic, but then we got brave and sewed. I got to see the finished prom dress from a distance and gave a silent cheer for the mother who made it work.
All complaining aside, the effort and frustrations are worth it when you see your daughter look beautiful, intelligent, and refined. That’s what modesty is about. It’s a mirror to reflect how she feels about herself and her Creator.
The Great Dissent: How Oliver Wendell Holmes Changed His Mind and Changed the History of Free Speech, by Thomas Healy
This book was good.
Do I enjoy reading about Constitutional Law? No. But this law book is very readable. Complex arguments are explained clearly by the author, and details of the lives of those involved make the story very interesting. You have the highly conservative Supreme Court Justice from New England who, through study and correspondence with more liberal and progressive friends, comes to see that “he was ignorant” in early cases involving free speech.
The late teens and early twenties was a time of real turmoil, with its own “Red scare” because of the Bolchevik Revolution, riots and strikes over labor issues, and protests about the U.S. involvement in WWI. There were several cases brought before the Supreme Court where the Justices had to decide under which conditions the First Amendment would apply. They wrestle with themes such as intent, war-time vs. peace- time speech, and the value of a “free market” of ideas.
You know that Oliver Wendell Holmes changes his mind from the title page, but it is the study of his correspondence, friendships, and the literature choices that influenced his opinion that makes this a fascinating read.
