Category: Motherhood

Little memories

Mark looks like me.

I teach the Sunbeams (ages 3-4) at church and I love them. I have been thinking about my memories of my Sunbeam year. I have observed that young children can be very perceptive of social concepts. Childhood is not always carefree.

For instance, I remember my mother taking me to preschool. I have always been frightened of everything, especially change. I remember laughing hysterically as I climbed a small playscape as my mother walked out of the room so it would seem like I didn’t notice that she was leaving. That was hard to do.

During that same preschool experience, I observed that the teacher’s helpers always held the social, pretty girls on their laps during singing time. I was not one of these girls. One day, there was a helper who held me on her lap and gave me a small, opened package of lifesavers when she had to leave. I followed her on the other side of the fence as she walked away on the sidewalk, wishing she wouldn’t leave me. I felt so much gratitude and love for that teenage girl!

I remember sitting in my Sunbeam class and the teacher held a picture of Jesus Christ and asked the class who it was. I said it was Heavenly Father. I felt so embarrassed because that wasn’t the right answer.

This year as I have taught Sunbeams, I have tried to remember that children are so very precious and although they can’t always verbalize why they are acting upset, their feelings are real and deep. I have loved their drawings, their hugs and even kisses on the cheek when they come to Primary. I watch them enter Primary and they are hoping to be noticed.

I once heard it said that a child needs to see your face light up when you see them. I think it’s true for the very young, especially as they make the big steps into Primary and school.

Going with them

“Of all the help we can give these young people, the greatest will be to let them feel our confidence that they are on the path home to God and that they can make it. And we do that by going with them.”

-President Henry B. Eyring, First Counselor in the First Presidency

I was studying this morning and found this quote really sang true in my heart. I am finding that the more I involve myself in what my children are doing, the more I am able to encourage them. It’s not about making their choices for them or doing their work for them. It’s about working alongside them. How do I do this?

I read the books they are studying.

I read to them.

I go on Cub Scout hikes and service projects.

I know which Personal Progress goal Paige is working on and I’m working on the same goal.

We make dinner together.

Sometimes the introspective loner in me takes over and I don’t feel like engaging in conversation, even though I am interested. It takes effort for me to dig deeply into my children’s thoughts by asking questions, but I see its value and I’m working to be better.

I learned when they were very young that you don’t ask children to clean a really messy room by themselves. You work alongside them and guide them. They don’t feel abandoned and overwhelmed and we each grow in love and appreciation for one another.

If you want children to do a job well, you have to teach it over and over and model it. You have to have expectations, but be forgiving and gentle as you correct them.

I try not to teach distractedly and I’m really winnowing down my computer use. It’s mostly a superfluous escape. But I’ll keep writing so my family far away knows that I am thinking of them and wanting them to be a part of our lives.

Thinking

I’m sitting in the house during a monsoon tHunDer StOrm. I’ve got the laptop unplugged because if lighting hit, I’d be seriously bothered. I run my life with a computer. It happened gradually and I still have my “I hate this machine” moments, but this computer is my friend.

I am glad my computer can remember addresses and phone numbers, help me communicate with 70 home school families in the area with one e-mail, and streamline my filing of school papers, notes, and artwork.

But I can live without it. While on vacation I went 2 1/2 weeks without it except to look up an address.

I could be a spokesman for digital scrapbooking. This computer has allowed me to keep a scrapbook that I can be proud of, despite time constraints.

Today I spent time catching up with people for my church assignment and “my community work.” The interaction was invigorating, in contrast to earlier this summer when it had become a great burden. I think that because I lack an off-site office, I don’t always see a line between my home and my work and my work easily trespasses into my home life. It’s good for me to set time limits on my community and church work and make appointments with myself to read that next chapter or escape to write a blog post.

Aren’t these red berries beautiful? My 7-year old took this picture.

Now I’m off to make dinner. End of blog appointment.

June is Scrapbook month

June has been all about organization. From school papers, art projects and closets, everything has had a thorough going-over. I’ve also been putting together the scrapbooks for 2009 and 2010. I let myself get about 18 months behind in our scrapbooks, so I’ve had a lot to do.

I was a hesitant scrapbook keeper at first because I don’t like being typical. Over the past 15 years, I have come to appreciate this growing record of our lives. When we moved away from Texas we had to live in corporate housing for a while (i.e. tiny apartment with not enough beds). Besides my clothing, all I wanted was my scrapbooks, so they followed us there.  I sat in our little apartment and poured over their pages. I needed to remember who I was in the shuffle, I guess.

Now that I have a blog I don’t want to copy what I am already doing online. However, I think that a blog has a different purpose than a scrapbook or a journal. I’m still trying to identify the purpose and future of this blog, but I think the scrapbooks are here to stay. Here is a sample of some of the pages I’ve done this month. This little book feature doesn’t show the bottom inch of my pages, but all well.

[book id='8' /]


It takes a hero

…to sew a gown in a day.

Paige WILL have sleeves and an adequate skirt on her gown at her big concert this weekend.

There is NOTHING in our stores that is appropriate. Trust me. We’ve looked.

The online world has failed us, too. I’m so glad I can sew.

I take it back. It doesn’t take a hero. It just takes a MOM.

Rushing and Racing

Last Saturday’s schedule:

5:45a.m. Drive  to airport (1 hr round trip)

7:10  Drop off Timothy at neighbor’s

7:15  Drive 30 minutes to bring Paige and Daniel to the U of A for piano ensemble practices

8:00-8:30  Wait for Daniel’s rehearsal to end; leave Paige

8:30 Drive 30 minutes to bring Daniel back to Sahuarita for team pictures

9:00 Meet Timothy at the ball field, drop off Daniel for practice

10:00 Drive 30 minutes back up to Tucson to pick up Paige

10:30 Pick up Paige and drive 30 minutes to ball field in Sahuarita

11:10 Pick up heat-exhausted Daniel, race home to eat lunch and let Paige change

12:00 Pick up produce co-op order

12:30-1:30 Paige’s dance performance. One of her songs was Slow Me Down (amen)

2:00 Mark, who has been my companion all day, is ready for an ice cream date

3:00 I take a rest and then get back up again.

New World to Me

Can it be that Paige has been dancing for 7 1/2 years and dance competition is something new to us?

Yes, it can.

Paige was in a dance competition on Saturday. Everything had to be altered: Costume, eye lashes, and hair. I altered some costumes and helped put on fake eyelashes behind stage.

She danced in a tall hotel in Phoenix where no food was allowed and $4 candy bars were sold for those desperate and rich enough. I watched 3 1/2 of hours of dance as I waited for Paige’s numbers. The music beat directly through important neural pathways, leaving me exhausted and weak. I suffered a great deal. I can’t imagine what Paige must have been going through.

Well, the dance team lifted Paige high above their heads and flipped her as planned and she was graceful and she was beautiful. They won second and third place in their division.

I expected to be exposed to Stage Mothers. This put me in great fear. I was so nervous I bought a new purse for courage (and I’m not a purse kind of girl). I walked in confidently with my new bag and a spring blouse, only to be met with

Bedazzled t-shirts.

Mothers weren’t sporting purses! They were sporting  “Elite Ballerina Mom” or “Dance Mom” in bling all over their chests. This is not me!  I said in my loudest, completely silent voice. Please don’t let this be my fate! I don’t want to be a Stage Mom. No! No! NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

And then I calmed down. I may not have bling, but I’m the kind of Stage Mom who tells her daughter, “Dance for yourself and your Heavenly Father and find joy. I’ll pray for you!” And, when it’s all over, I’m the Stage Mom who tries to tell everyone they were beautiful.  I’m also the kind of Stage Mother who WILL henceforth sneak in snacks (in my spacious new purse). Let’s hope it’s a long time until another competition comes our way.

Under Construction

When a website is undergoing some kind of change, they say it’s “under construction.”

Something like that is happening here. I am a hesitant blogger (despite my frequent posts) because unlike many bloggers,  I am not here to start a discussion. I’m just here to share. I share to maintain relationships with family and have some personal validation. I have a very small readership. (Bless each of you!) I get a lot of questions about curriculum and activities, so I have tried to share these things here. This may be changing, however.

First, two bits of background information:

A few months ago I found a discussion that asked, “At what point do you stop posting about your children because they are old enough to tell their own stories?” This question has hovered over my head for a while and I can see wisdom in not treading heavily on the experiences of childhood. I have tried to be careful with what I post about the heart-wrenching or embarrassing moments of growing up. There are no posts showing the painful smile after braces or striking out during a baseball game, etc.

This weekend I read a homeschooling discussion and was once again shocked and horrified to read the hatred and mistrust that is directed against parents who educate their own children. Such comments ignore the good and highlight the bad. I have seen homeschooling done very well and I’ve seen it done very poorly. Over the past several days my reaction to the acerbic tone of so many against this movement has been to crawl into a shell and ponder two questions,

“Is the online telling of the education of my children ultimately unfair to them?” (even though I block search engines)

and,

“Do my homeschooling posts serve anyone but myself?”

Since I’m not looking for a discussion, I don’t expect these questions to be answered by my readers, but through prayer. And believe me, that’s enough.

But, if you see fewer posts in the future, or see that I suddenly start posting pictures of decorated corners of my house instead of scenes from the schoolroom you will know that I have decided to protect that aspect of our lives.