Category: Fatherhood

December Snapshots

We made gingerbread houses with Grandma and the cousins over Zoom.
Timothy turned 18 and one of his gifts was a quilt I made from his baseball uniforms.
I spent a lot of time planning this year: consolidating errands, creating more handmade things, shopping away from crowds, finding good music, and organizing creative ways to visit and give safely.
My brother Joe and his family delivered their gifts to our porch with a song.
Richard was awarded a patent. On the plaque, he is titled, “Inventor.”
Christmas Eve Zoom Call
Grandma Ruth really liked her Squirrel calendar and held it up to the screen for a good 5 minutes.
Our dog is really showing his age right now. He is cold and off-balance, confused, and nervous. Some days are better than others. Aging stinks.
Small celebrations call for selfies.
With nowhere to go, we gave enormous Lego sets to keep everyone busy.
I made nachos instead of turkey on Christmas Day. I made beautiful dinners each Sunday, but Richard decided to photograph this meal from every angle. 😀 Everyone lingered and smiled through this gathering. Mark is sporting new contact lenses this month. He is thrilled!

Payson Lakes

a beaver
The Dread Pirate Roberts

While I was in California, Richard took the kids (minus Daniel) camping at Payson Lakes. He took our small popup trailer and a tent, and cooked a nice Dutch oven dinner for everyone. I’ve always thought that Richard knows how to make the most of every opportunity. He has done things like this for the kids their whole lives.

Shuffling

Last week we sold our old black 1999 Toyota Sienna. It sold immediately after we listed it, and the emotions caught us a little by surprise. I guess it symbolized the adventures of raising our kids. It was a hassle-free car, with very few repairs needed during the past 18 years we owned it. I gave it a good pat and said thank you before it left our house for the last time.

During the past few months we have sold the van, Richard’s car, and three trailers, but Timothy fills in the spaces with his hobby cars. One of these must go before the snow arrives.

Tim’s Covid cars: lots of ventilation and only room for two people.

Happy things today

A happy list today:

Negative Covid test results for a loved one

A sunflower in a vase beside my sink

My Christmas quilt is all quilted with gold swirls and I’ve attached the binding. It’s ready for hand sewing. This might be my favorite step.

New fabric on the pillows

Time spent in the Book of Mormon: I love that book.

Our kids have fun interests (classic cars, portraits, music composition, cooking, piano, woodworking, reading) and they are good company.

Richard is a good calculus tutor.

Rain is in the forecast.

My first issue of The Friend arrived today, after letting our subscription lapse for a few years after our kids left Primary. I have missed this church magazine!

I just watched the first episode of The Chosen series. I don’t think it’s very accurate but I really liked it, if for no other reason than it portrays biblical personalities as relatable people.

Pastimes

When Richard goes off on adventures, I stay home to fluff the flowers and pillows. This was our weekend.

This week, I am working on finishing a quilt and scanning certificates and awards for Timothy’s Sterling Scholar application. Most of us here are outmatched by assignments and work and concerns, but thankfully, Mark is not. I need to be more like Mark.

There aren’t enough batteries at our house. Maybe you can relate to that stalled little black car, just as I do this week.

Home

These weeks have not been easy. The not knowing, the not-so-good news, the waiting, painful conversations with people who heard Daniel was home when he was not, the constant school emails, and the work stress were rough. Things were complicated in Chile. Daniel helped print four different release certificates for himself in the mission office as his evacuation date moved several times. I prayed for peace constantly. One night, out of words to pray, I lay in bed praying the words to “Bring Him Home,” which was one of my more effective prayers.

Neither Richard nor I slept well the night before Daniel’s flight, and Richard tracked that plane constantly throughout the day. I kept busy, but felt my chest tighten as the day progressed. We drove to the airport together, two nervous wrecks. No, we didn’t think he would come home sick or harmed, but we were embarking into an unknown. Daniel arrived, full of light and reassurance. That night, I had my best sleep in years.

It’s not that we lacked faith. It’s that faith sometimes needs to be tested. Would we complain? Would we push our needs ahead of others who were suffering in different ways? Would we keep turning to God? Would we be overly dramatic about circumstances? Would we neglect the needs of our other children as we hyper-focused on our worries about international travel for Daniel? Would we stop acknowledging the blessings that flowed because Daniel was serving a mission? Would we forget hope? Would we neglect the little things like family prayer and scripture study in this sickly, dense fog?

There is much more to live before the resolution of this story. I don’t want to forget the comfort that only came through prayer. I don’t want to forget the light in Daniel’s missionary face. I don’t want to forget that there was a continual flow of understanding and concrete instructions as I read the Book of Mormon each day, pen in hand. These have been precious, soul-expanding days leading up to his return. Now that he is home, I am giving myself permission to breathe, rejoice, rest, and just look at Daniel’s face, in line with the rest of our children, all gathered together again.

Thoughts on a Snow Day

The snow day, and its limitations and opportunities, has brought out different things in each of us. I pull into my familiar routines of comfort, warmth, and words. Richard makes gallant efforts every few hours to push the next 8-12″ off the driveway since the last pass. Tim has been gone since 5:45, earning money shoveling snow. Mark, feeling caged and frustrated, made toffee, then a gourmet lunch, and settled in for an afternoon of television. Whenever he surfaces, it is to complain how snow days seem like they will be great until they happen. Tim is driving our best snow vehicle, but we have no plans to go anywhere in this weather. I just watched the mail carrier’s truck fishtail out of the circle, despite chains on his wheels. No mail today. When storms like this come, it is often 24 hours before the plows can reach our home. 18″ of snow fell today. I will feel better when Tim makes it safely back to the driveway. I will make warm, starchy comfort food and keep alternating between two delicious books.

We had a video call with Daniel today, in a new area with a friend assigned as his new companion. Challenges include crime, no hot water, very high temperatures and no wind, and an empty area book. He smiles and smiles while telling me this, and I know he’s having the best time.