Author: Angela

I write so my family will always have letters from home.

When we shine, we gather

I taught a singing lesson in Primary today. There were only 18 kids there, between the ages of 3 and 10, and I taught them the song, I Know My Father Lives. The lyrics are a simple group of statements about our Heavenly Father and the Spirit:

“I know my Father Lives, and loves me too, the Spirit whispers this to me and tells me it is true, and tells me it is true.”

I brought an empty picture frame and carried it around the room, holding it in front of each child’s face, and repeating, “You are a child of God and He loves you.” The children would sit up a little straighter as I brought the frame in front of their faces. The older boys shifted a little, feeling the power of the statements and some discomfort from the attention, and wishing to diffuse some of that feeling. Younger children were the most capable of bearing those words without a wobble. As I spoke and looked into each face, it was a sacred experience. When I walked back to the front of the room, several of the kids said, what about you? Aren’t you going to say it for yourself? So, I said it for myself, “I am a child of God and He loves me.” Ah, belonging! You can’t have it without some vulnerability.

Elder Cook wrote, “When we shine, we gather.” Sometimes it takes courage to shine, to carry around that frame, look someone in the eyes, and remind them they are a child of God and He loves them so much. “To gather” can bring to mind the idea of a hug, or any gesture that reminds people that they belong.

(I am adding the themes that our youth learn as teens. I love the doctrine that we are children of heavenly parents.)

Remote

Another remote learning day. I hear a chipmunk voice as Mark rushes through a recorded lecture at 2x the speed. Routines are interrupted and even Richard and I had a slow morning. We keep one another moving and upbeat as schedules turn malleable as dough.

West is home

I took an Old Testament course a few years ago which taught me to look at the words of Genesis more allegorically, or poetically. So when I read that God planted a garden eastward in Eden, I think the author symbolically places God in the west. Cain chooses to dwell east of Eden, which would be as far from God as possible.

Later, when the Tabernacle is constructed, the orientation is east to west, with the Holy of Holies taking the far west position. East to west, this is the direction the high priest would take to commune with God.

East and west, this is the orientation of my house. In the different seasons I know when the sun will light up my kitchen in the morning, and I know when to look out my western windows for the sunset.

East to west, I follow the sun each day.

East to west, disciples try to follow the Son each day.

Every day is a chance to begin again. Every day is a chance to pray and study and do something kind. I want to follow, east to west, because west is home.

I collect dishes

I have been reading about the art and psychology of homemaking, and the objects people choose to place in their homes to reflect what is important to them. One of my kids commented that I have added things during the pandemic that look like they belong in a temple, maybe because we couldn’t attend for a while. Over time, I have displayed more and more heirlooms, photos of ancestors, and beautiful dishes.

I have an obsession with beautiful dishes.

I wonder what that says about me.

I think my collection shows that I love to make the time memorable at family meals. The dishes I have inherited help me remember the fine ladies in my ancestry. I love many of the same beautiful things they loved. I am old fashioned, a flowery seventies girl, kind of like those brown calico plates. I don’t think I could name a favorite set. I love them all: my wedding china (collected after 26 years), the orange set for Halloween from the dollar store, Grandma Stewart’s Christmas Spode, Aunt Susan’s browns, the blue and white Liberty Blue, the elegant white bone china, the pink Depression glass, and the jade green plates… they help us celebrate seasons and family and beauty. Many pieces are antiques, which means they have seen people through all kinds of things. They are permanence and beauty, so let the world swirl around outside, sit down, and enjoy the serenity of old, steady things and a lovely meal.

Home vs the News

I take part in very different experiences depending on how much news I allow into my head. Again and again through this pandemic, I find a great contrast in our personal experiences compared to the picture painted by other voices. I don’t deny the real suffering going on, but I don’t have to open the door and invite it in all the time. I don’t think our minds are equipped to handle the amount of information in the constant news cycle.

We definitely don’t go out as much. We are blessed with pretty good internet and a home with lots of space. Richard still works from home in the basement office. I am mentally preparing for remote learning for Mark as case numbers rise. The pandemic continues to push us home, and I am doing what I can to make it pleasant. Without question, we are profoundly blessed.

Rest in Peace, little hamster.

Is it too late for a summary post of the things I read in 2021?

2021 was a weird year, wasn’t it? For me, I was dealing with grief, preparing to send Tim away, and stretching a lot in church work. I was sick more than I wanted to be. It seems I read either fluff or lead. I read consistently and intentionally, which I learned was better for me than trying to read a certain number of books. I have highlighted the books that I think will stay with me the longest.

  • Death Comes for the Archbishop by Willa Cather (I loved it in a deeply personal way.)
  • The Great Silence: Britain from the Shadow of the First World War to the Dawn of the Jazz Age by Juliet Nicholson (I liked the variety of accounts the author found from the time. It opened my mind to the idea of collective national grief.)
  • Recollections of my Nonexistence by Rebecca Solnit (I really like the things she shares about writing and influence and women. I also appreciate her earnestness, even if I can’t embrace all she says.)
  • Gideon’s Trumpet: How one man, and poor prisoner, took his case to the Supreme Court — and changed the law of the United States, by Anthony Lewis (Just excellent)
  • The Book of Mormon, Another Testament of Jesus Christ (focus: the ministering of angels; the Lord’s promises to the House of Israel)
  • Wild Pork and Watercress by Barry Crump (This is the book from which the movie, Hunt for the Wilderpeople is based. It was fun.)
  • A Room with a View by E.M. Forster (Just an escape, quick and easy to read.)
  • My Antonia by Willa Cather (I liked the chapters about childhood best. There are stories while they lived on the plains that are unforgettable.)
  • Dusk, Night, Dawn: on Revival and Courage by Anne Lamott (She shows me how memoir can help someone with a very different life feel less alone.)
  • Theodore Rex by Edmund Morris (This was difficult for me to finish because it was focused more on policy than Roosevelt’s sparkly personality.)
  • Guilty Admissions: The Bribes, Favors, and Phonies Behind the College Admissions Scandal by Nicole LaPorte (The author helps explain how this could happen, from cultural expectations, wealth and privilege, and helicopter parenting, to the lack of oversight in college admissions and the greed of Rick Singer and elite schools. I felt the fascination-repulsion reflex throughout.)
  • Freely and Lightly by Emily Lex (I absolutely loved this.)
  • A New Song by Jan Karon (The fifth novel in the Mitford series)
  • Recipes for a Sacred Life: true stories and a few miracles by Rivvy Neshama (I loved the short vignettes of sweet moments in life. Lots of different countries and traditions represented here.)
  • Iron Rose by Lorie H. Nicholes (An out of print page-turner.)
  • Angels Round About by Lorie H Nicholes (Not as good as the previous book I read by this author.)
  • I am Malala by Malala Yousefzai and Christina Lamb (I loved it.)
  • A Rose in War part 1: Barbed Wire by Lorie H. Nicholes
  • A Rose in War part 2: Rebirth of Hope by Lorie H Nicholes
  • O Pioneers! by Willa Cather (I wish I had been warned how sad this story is. I really like the writing.)
  • Miss Buncle’s Book by D. E. Stevenson (fun)
  • Miss Buncle Married by D. E. Stevenson
  • The Two Mrs. Abbotts by D. E. Stevenson
  • Freely and Lightly by Emily Lex (second reading)
  • One of Ours by Willa Cather (W.C. is my author of the year. This book wasn’t rosebuds and butterflies but it felt more real than most things in books.)
  • Simple Justice: the History of Brown v. Board of Education and Black America’s Struggle for Equality by Richard Kluger (This changed my thinking more than any book I have read this year, and maybe many years. The author chose to focus not just on the legal questions involved in school segregation, but the history and culture of our nation and the stories of the individuals involved. Some people were so inspiring. Some things were so revolting. It was a difficult book and a difficult topic, and I needed this education. The author forgot the people in his telling of the Supreme Court decision at the end, and I was left to wonder what happened to all those attorneys from the NAACP and the specific people they represented in their cases that were bundled and presented before the Supreme Court. I would like to read their biographies.)
  • The Importance of Being Earnest by Oscar Wilde  (Now it’s time to watch the 2002 film starring Colin Firth, Rupert Everett, Judy Dench, and Reese Witherspoon.)
  • A Common Life: The Wedding Story by Jan Karon (This book is like a comfy robe and slippers. Mitford book #6)
  • An Ideal Husband by Oscar Wilde (Now it’s time to watch the 1999 film adaptation starring Rupert Everett, Cate Blanchett, Jeremy North, and Minnie Driver.)
  • In This Mountain by Jan Karon (Mitford #7)
  • Shepherds Abiding by Jan Karon (Mitford #8, I really love this one. It’s a Christmas story.)
  • Light from Heaven by Jan Karon (This inspires me to be a better minister. Mitford #9)
  • The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ (I studied very slowly and deeply this time, looking for answers in several personal dilemmas. It works.)
  • The Book Woman of Troublesome Creek by Kim Michele Richardson (It was fine. A quick read.)
  • Persuasion by Jane Austen
  • Home to Holly Springs by Jan Karon (This was a heavier read than the usual Mitford fare by this author.)
  • Seekers Wanted: The Skills You Need for the Faith You Want by Anthony Sweat (This was really good, especially for a young adult audience, but the chapter on sustaining the prophet is the best I have read anywhere on the topic.)
  • In the Company of Others by Jan Karon
  • Somewhere Safe With Someone Good by Jan Karon
  • Come Rain or Come Shine by Jan Karon
  • To Be Where You Are by Jan Karon
  • The Book of Mormon, Another Testament of Jesus Christ
  • The Year of Magical Thinking by Joan Didion (This is about grief, and her writing is beautiful.)

Unique times call for incredible women

This is my presidency, my Covid era, incredible stake Primary presidency. We have been masked, filmed, Zoomed and distanced for most of the time we have served. We have adapted again and again, visited Primary leaders on porches and phones, held meetings outdoors and distanced in chapels. We have facilitated baptisms one by one, keeping families safe. Tonight I decided to take a picture after our masked meeting so I can remember this time, and also how we look behind those masks.