Angela – Page 168 – Letters from Home

Paradoxes in a Narrow Canyon

We visited some slot canyons among 31 friends on Friday. Most passages through these canyons were not too narrow, but there were a few places that we needed to slither and slide. The young kids ran through them with ease, leaving the adults behind. I did just fine, even though I feel claustrophobic and trapped at the car wash and even the drive up lane at McDonald’s. The rest of our family is fearless, so I didn’t worry about them.

The essence of our personalities emerged when we were faced with a decision between a significant drop or a very narrow passage through the rock. Each person chose a path, facing different levels of fear and trepidation. A team was required to get everyone through this tight spot. The men went through the narrow passage and then helped lower the rest of the group down the hole between boulders. Some teenagers stayed behind to help, too. I found myself being brave for a change and not feeling panic. I had to trust that those who were lowering me through this crevice had been through it before me, had a thorough knowledge of each ledge they told me to navigate, and finally, that they had the strength to lower me safely to the ground.

Many truths about life and the gospel are paradoxes. For instance, you would think that accepting help from others would make me feel weak or powerless, but the opposite was true. Exercising faith and trust is an act of courage and strength of will. Faith, when grounded in something true, becomes very empowering. Also, when I allowed myself to be helped and even carried for a few seconds, I felt valued and treasured. No doubt others experienced different lessons based on the role they played in the canyon and their life experiences.

We all have good memories from the day and many lessons were taught. I will always remember that lesson of courage in faith and the resulting feelings of worth that I experienced in the canyon. I was grateful for people who sacrificed to help us make it through that narrow and scary spot.

More Spring Break: Group shots

I’ve been looking at these group shots every few hours all day. They make me smile. Thank you, Lana and Janine for sharing these.

Spring Break Trip

We went camping with several families in the Escalante area over Spring Break. We had adventures, saw beautiful views, had a midnight tow for our truck from a remote location, laughed with friends, danced, went kayaking, hiking, and exploring. The slot canyons we visited and the falls at Calf Creek were spectacular. The other families were generous, fun, and great company.

He is Risen

Easter music has accompanied me this week in the car. I’m working through Handel’s Messiah sung by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir this afternoon. Today the choir at church sang two beautiful numbers. I am thankful for music at Easter time. It gives voice to what’s in my heart and helps me make this a real day of celebration.

Impromptu temple tour

Paige and I had an adventure this week across town and noticed that we were close to the Oquirrh Mountain temple. We had never visited this temple so we stopped by and took a picture. On the way home we drove past the Jordan River temple and looked around. The next day we stopped at the Provo temple for tradition’s sake. When I was a little girl I would ask my parents to take me home by way of the Provo temple, which wasn’t in our path home, but I never remember them saying no to my request.

Birthday Girl

The kids were out of school so we were able to go on an early birthday picnic for my mom. We gave her a tiara. If you see her today, remind her to put it on. She’s a queen and it’s her birthday.

Happy, happy day!

Easter week

I have been looking forward to this week for a long time. It’s Spring Break and the kids are home with me. Hooray!

It’s also Easter week. To celebrate, each day I am focusing on something specific to be a better disciple of Christ. I’m focusing on personal religious practices, missionary efforts, and service. When I first started thinking of what I could do each day, the ideas were pretty basic, but now that I have this focus on trying to be a better disciple, I find that the day is full of unexpected and interesting opportunities and there is a spirit of adventure in the search and in the acts.

Jesus Christ really is the great liberator.

No Speck so Troublesome as Self

I am reading Middlemarch by George Eliot. It is taking me forever. It’s a real study in human psychology. One character named Mr. Casaubon is someone you learn to abhor, but also understand. His main problem is selfishness. He believes his personal project is a sacrifice for mankind, but really, his work serves to feed his ego. He doesn’t realize how his pride and selfishness taint his view of humanity. He misinterprets acts kindness as insults to his abilities. He is hyper-sensitive to suggestions, thinking they are criticisms. His focus on self shows the smallness of pride and the insecurity that follows. He’s such an interesting character.

Will not a tiny speck very close to our vision blot out the glory of the world, and leave only a margin by which we see the blot? I know no speck so troublesome as self.

-Middlemarch by George Eliot

Spring Lake Easter Egg Hunt 2014

We gathered at Spring Lake for the annual Easter egg hunt, hosted by my parents.

The Round House is gone, and there are only the footings of the new house in place.

The boys and Richard helped my dad haul literally a ton of rocks and remove dead wood. Paige and I helped my mom hide all of the eggs while they were thus distracted. Timothy and Mark enjoyed working with the saw and pruners. Mark was especially proud of his bundle of sticks and asked to make one more before we left. Some cousins arrived and baby Ruth and Sparky hit it off almost immediately.

Sparky noticed that she needed a little face wash and he cleaned her right up.

It was such a pleasant day. We had some lunch and began the Easter egg hunt. We spectators had a great time watching the kids find the eggs. Richard *might* also be smiling because we bought that truck in the background on Friday. It’s a nice ride.

This is a picture of Richard and me eating chocolates and watching the kids play.This is the view of the new temple from my parents’ property. Beautiful.

We missed Sarah’s, Matt’s, and Paul’s families who couldn’t make it. We know what it’s like to miss the Annual Easter Egg hunt, but the beauty of family traditions is that there will always be next year.

(Most of these photos were taken by Paige. Thank you!)

An empty frame

I have decided to hang a few pictures above my desk. Here I will display a few of the life events, people, and accomplishments that are important to me. I have a photo of my college graduation, my seminary class in Texas, the Young Women in Arizona in front of the Mesa temple, our kids beside the community pond that we maintained in Arizona, a violin performance, and a few others.

I am having trouble finding a photo to represent what I am accomplishing right now.

What I do is repetitive. It involves a lot of time behind the wheel of the van. It is messy. It is either very quiet or very noisy. My life is the observation of tiny expressions, mumbled teenage words, small conversations, and lessons. It’s not on stage; I’m not posing in front of a great monument; there are no journals waiting to publish my words. But it is full. And it is good.

Mothering (our own children or others’ children) is full of minute acts. It’s creation. The world is focused on finished products. Because motherhood is creation, the work is never really finished.

I have decided to hang an empty frame on my wall to remind myself that the life I am living right now is what I came here to do, but a photo wouldn’t be able to capture the facets of it. My empty frame will remind me that THIS stuff that I am doing right now is my greatest work.

Now that I write this, rather than an empty frame, I think a small mirror could be my reminder to keep creating.